Post by Jaezred Vandree on Aug 25, 2024 2:38:56 GMT
(Before Leaves Off the Tree.)
In the courtyard of the Four Fair Winds, under the bountiful shade of maple tree, Jaezred’s bare-chested form lounges in a lawn chair. Rae shows up with their hair tied up and just in a shirt and shorts, giving a tired smile as they slump into an unoccupied chair next to Jaezred’s.
“There you are,” he says, his hand lazily unlatching an ice chest. “Been keeping this cold for a while.”
Rae leans over and reaches a hand into the chest. They pick up a wafer cone bearing a large scoop of vanilla ice cream, with blueberry jam streaked around the snowy white and bits of brown cinnamon crumble embedded within. One sugary-sweet lick of this chilled dairy treat beats back the heat like a pleasant breeze suffusing the body.
Jaezred takes an identical cone from the chest and sits back down. “I know it’s not as quaint as the New Hillborrow countryside, but the quiet is agreeable,” he says, glancing around at the shaded courtyard.
They relax back into the seat and take another lick of the ice cream, letting out a contented sigh and shifting to get a little more comfortable in their seat. “Quiet… Yep, quiet is good. Thank you, Jaezred.”
The two of them sit there eating ice cream, basking in the hot and the cold, listening to birdsong and cicada-song and the low din of a city at peace.
When Rae has finished their ice cream, Jaezred looks over to them and clears his throat. “So… Have you seen Keros at all?”
They wince a little, then shake their head quietly. “Not at all.”
Jaezred sits up straighter, fiddling with his thumbs, his gaze sticking on anything but them. The handsome, confident Lord Jaezred Vandree suddenly seems more like a shy schoolboy. “Well, Rae, I’ve heard some things about Keros recently,” he says slowly. “I think it would be best if you hear about them first before, er…finding out. Would you…like to…?” His voice trails off in awkward uncertainty.
Rae narrows their eyes at him and sits up, a bit more attentive. “If you’ve got something to tell me, you should say it straight. This isn’t like you.”
“Right, w-well, I…” he sputters a bit. “It’s just that we’ve not spoken about Keros since you split up. So I am finding this a little difficult to talk about.”
They take a deep breath and stare at Jaezred. “And I’ve appreciated you not…needling about it, or being pushy. But if you brought me here to tell me something, you should tell me.”
“Very well. Best to do it quickly.” Jaezred sucks in a breath and holds it. “Some time ago, Keros went to the Winter Court and gave up his happiest memory in a fey bargain. It was to help a friend, but, er…there’s reason to believe that the memory he gave up involves you. Perhaps, the first time the two of you got together.” He pauses for a tense second, rubbing the back of his neck. “That’s not all. I saw him at the party in the Witching Court flirting with someone.”
Rae sits silently for a long moment. They lean forward and rest their head in their hands. A meek and muffled voice peeks out from behind their hands.
“I really messed up.”
For a solid few seconds, Jaezred sits there staring at Rae, still in the dread of finding oneself in an emotionally charged situation. With beads of sweat sliding down his forehead, he gingerly puts a hand on their back and pats.
“Keros was in a bad place. I don’t think he’s proud of what he did,” the drow ventures. “The memory thing, that is. Not the flirting.”
“He might not be proud of it…but it doesn’t make it a bad choice—” Rae’s voice gets caught in their throat and they stifle their tears. “I was cursed then too. One that I chose to put on myself. I spent more time in my relationship with him cursed than not. Of course you should try and forget that!”
They begin sobbing and lean towards Jaezred to rest their head. He is surprised by the motion, but he lets it happen. After a beat, he wraps his arms around Rae.
“I disagree,” he murmurs. “I must say, choosing to forget a happy moment with you is foolish no matter what.”
“It’s better this way. He deserves to be happy and live a good life. I just… That’s what I wanted to give him. I just wanted to help…” They wipe their nose and eyes of tears, sniffling through their words.
“I know, kiddo. I know.” Jaezred pulls out a handkerchief from his back pocket. “I think he knows that too.”
Rae takes the handkerchief and blows their nose, then continues to cry on Jaezred’s shoulder for a while.
When they manage to compose themselves somewhat, they reach into their backpack and pull out a small wooden figure. It seems to depict Rae themselves, and when they hit a button on the back, their coat billows as if in the wind.
“Pipper made this for me… After we helped a family when they lost their home in a fire… There was a little halfling girl… She told me she wanted to be a wizard when she grows up.” They turn the figure over in their hands and manage a small laugh in between sobs. “It’s everything I’ve wanted to be. Someone who helps. But it doesn’t feel like me. This is someone else. They don’t know what I’ve done.”
Jaezred gently takes the little clockwork Rae in his hand, smiling fondly as he turns it about and appreciates its details. “Is that not you and I too, Rae? You look up at me and see someone you want to be. But you've no idea the things I’ve done, the man I used to be.”
Rae takes a moment to process that realisation, looking between the little toy and Jaezred. “Are we both of them? Or neither of them? The hero and the…mortal.”
“No one is ever just one thing, Rae. This”—he holds up the toy in front of them—“is you, but it’s not all of you. I am most fortunate in having found someone who knows all of me — the evil and the good — and takes me as I am. In her eyes, I am neither a monster nor a hero, but a person made of a complex tapestry of choices and experiences. And luckily for me, she likes what she sees.” He puts the toy back in Rae’s palms and cups his hands over theirs, squeezing warmly. “I pray that you find someone like that for yourself. Someone who accepts you with all your mistakes and helps you get back on the right path. When you look into their eyes, you will see who you truly are — all of you, with all the faults and virtues.”
They nod slowly, holding the toy tight in their hands and enjoying the quiet moment. They then tip their head backwards and sniffle, blinking the last of the tears out of their eyes before slowly moving to retract their hands.
“Thank you… I think I know what I need to do from here. I’ll let you know if I need your help.”
Jaezred grins and ruffles their hair. “To me, you’ll always be my kid.”
He turns to reach into the chest, picking up two more ice cream cones. “Oh, by the way,” he says in a tone that could almost be called gossipy, “his name is Carell. He’s an eladrin, an artist from the Feywild.”
Rae hides their blushing cheeks behind the ice cream and manages a little laugh in spite of it all. “Stop it! I don’t need to know that…”
They take a few licks of the ice cream and look forward. Without looking aside, they just ask, “Do you know what he looks like?”
“Hmm. Slender body, smooth skin, a mop of dark hair, a pretty face… In short, hot.”
Rae takes a deep breath and pauses for a moment, before looking over and saying, “Well… Sounds like Keros should be more worried about you making a move than me.” They give a little laugh, and sniffle, but throw a grin at him.
Jaezred bursts out laughing and gives them a playful shove on the shoulder. “Eat your ice cream. You little punk.”
They snort and continue to eat the sweet treat with a small, tired smile.
Co-written with Harry
In the courtyard of the Four Fair Winds, under the bountiful shade of maple tree, Jaezred’s bare-chested form lounges in a lawn chair. Rae shows up with their hair tied up and just in a shirt and shorts, giving a tired smile as they slump into an unoccupied chair next to Jaezred’s.
“There you are,” he says, his hand lazily unlatching an ice chest. “Been keeping this cold for a while.”
Rae leans over and reaches a hand into the chest. They pick up a wafer cone bearing a large scoop of vanilla ice cream, with blueberry jam streaked around the snowy white and bits of brown cinnamon crumble embedded within. One sugary-sweet lick of this chilled dairy treat beats back the heat like a pleasant breeze suffusing the body.
Jaezred takes an identical cone from the chest and sits back down. “I know it’s not as quaint as the New Hillborrow countryside, but the quiet is agreeable,” he says, glancing around at the shaded courtyard.
They relax back into the seat and take another lick of the ice cream, letting out a contented sigh and shifting to get a little more comfortable in their seat. “Quiet… Yep, quiet is good. Thank you, Jaezred.”
The two of them sit there eating ice cream, basking in the hot and the cold, listening to birdsong and cicada-song and the low din of a city at peace.
When Rae has finished their ice cream, Jaezred looks over to them and clears his throat. “So… Have you seen Keros at all?”
They wince a little, then shake their head quietly. “Not at all.”
Jaezred sits up straighter, fiddling with his thumbs, his gaze sticking on anything but them. The handsome, confident Lord Jaezred Vandree suddenly seems more like a shy schoolboy. “Well, Rae, I’ve heard some things about Keros recently,” he says slowly. “I think it would be best if you hear about them first before, er…finding out. Would you…like to…?” His voice trails off in awkward uncertainty.
Rae narrows their eyes at him and sits up, a bit more attentive. “If you’ve got something to tell me, you should say it straight. This isn’t like you.”
“Right, w-well, I…” he sputters a bit. “It’s just that we’ve not spoken about Keros since you split up. So I am finding this a little difficult to talk about.”
They take a deep breath and stare at Jaezred. “And I’ve appreciated you not…needling about it, or being pushy. But if you brought me here to tell me something, you should tell me.”
“Very well. Best to do it quickly.” Jaezred sucks in a breath and holds it. “Some time ago, Keros went to the Winter Court and gave up his happiest memory in a fey bargain. It was to help a friend, but, er…there’s reason to believe that the memory he gave up involves you. Perhaps, the first time the two of you got together.” He pauses for a tense second, rubbing the back of his neck. “That’s not all. I saw him at the party in the Witching Court flirting with someone.”
Rae sits silently for a long moment. They lean forward and rest their head in their hands. A meek and muffled voice peeks out from behind their hands.
“I really messed up.”
For a solid few seconds, Jaezred sits there staring at Rae, still in the dread of finding oneself in an emotionally charged situation. With beads of sweat sliding down his forehead, he gingerly puts a hand on their back and pats.
“Keros was in a bad place. I don’t think he’s proud of what he did,” the drow ventures. “The memory thing, that is. Not the flirting.”
“He might not be proud of it…but it doesn’t make it a bad choice—” Rae’s voice gets caught in their throat and they stifle their tears. “I was cursed then too. One that I chose to put on myself. I spent more time in my relationship with him cursed than not. Of course you should try and forget that!”
They begin sobbing and lean towards Jaezred to rest their head. He is surprised by the motion, but he lets it happen. After a beat, he wraps his arms around Rae.
“I disagree,” he murmurs. “I must say, choosing to forget a happy moment with you is foolish no matter what.”
“It’s better this way. He deserves to be happy and live a good life. I just… That’s what I wanted to give him. I just wanted to help…” They wipe their nose and eyes of tears, sniffling through their words.
“I know, kiddo. I know.” Jaezred pulls out a handkerchief from his back pocket. “I think he knows that too.”
Rae takes the handkerchief and blows their nose, then continues to cry on Jaezred’s shoulder for a while.
When they manage to compose themselves somewhat, they reach into their backpack and pull out a small wooden figure. It seems to depict Rae themselves, and when they hit a button on the back, their coat billows as if in the wind.
“Pipper made this for me… After we helped a family when they lost their home in a fire… There was a little halfling girl… She told me she wanted to be a wizard when she grows up.” They turn the figure over in their hands and manage a small laugh in between sobs. “It’s everything I’ve wanted to be. Someone who helps. But it doesn’t feel like me. This is someone else. They don’t know what I’ve done.”
Jaezred gently takes the little clockwork Rae in his hand, smiling fondly as he turns it about and appreciates its details. “Is that not you and I too, Rae? You look up at me and see someone you want to be. But you've no idea the things I’ve done, the man I used to be.”
Rae takes a moment to process that realisation, looking between the little toy and Jaezred. “Are we both of them? Or neither of them? The hero and the…mortal.”
“No one is ever just one thing, Rae. This”—he holds up the toy in front of them—“is you, but it’s not all of you. I am most fortunate in having found someone who knows all of me — the evil and the good — and takes me as I am. In her eyes, I am neither a monster nor a hero, but a person made of a complex tapestry of choices and experiences. And luckily for me, she likes what she sees.” He puts the toy back in Rae’s palms and cups his hands over theirs, squeezing warmly. “I pray that you find someone like that for yourself. Someone who accepts you with all your mistakes and helps you get back on the right path. When you look into their eyes, you will see who you truly are — all of you, with all the faults and virtues.”
They nod slowly, holding the toy tight in their hands and enjoying the quiet moment. They then tip their head backwards and sniffle, blinking the last of the tears out of their eyes before slowly moving to retract their hands.
“Thank you… I think I know what I need to do from here. I’ll let you know if I need your help.”
Jaezred grins and ruffles their hair. “To me, you’ll always be my kid.”
He turns to reach into the chest, picking up two more ice cream cones. “Oh, by the way,” he says in a tone that could almost be called gossipy, “his name is Carell. He’s an eladrin, an artist from the Feywild.”
Rae hides their blushing cheeks behind the ice cream and manages a little laugh in spite of it all. “Stop it! I don’t need to know that…”
They take a few licks of the ice cream and look forward. Without looking aside, they just ask, “Do you know what he looks like?”
“Hmm. Slender body, smooth skin, a mop of dark hair, a pretty face… In short, hot.”
Rae takes a deep breath and pauses for a moment, before looking over and saying, “Well… Sounds like Keros should be more worried about you making a move than me.” They give a little laugh, and sniffle, but throw a grin at him.
Jaezred bursts out laughing and gives them a playful shove on the shoulder. “Eat your ice cream. You little punk.”
They snort and continue to eat the sweet treat with a small, tired smile.
Co-written with Harry