21 Nov [Greenwich] Con Air 2: Team Brian
Nov 22, 2018 10:42:04 GMT
via mobile
Dorian, Malri 'Taffeta' Thistletop, and 1 more like this
Post by grahams on Nov 22, 2018 10:42:04 GMT
Sean Paul: DM
Pop: Gnome Ranger
Allo: Gnome Monk
Harrow Hallfeather: Halfling Wizard
Bodhi: Radical Beach Dwarf
Tiny party so far, so to get us up to the weight limit: Big Blue: Firbolg Wild Magic Mage
Tina: Tiefling Great Old One Warlock disguised as half elf
Hired as wagon protection by Gerald “Mr Nighttime” to guard a wagon of silks, medicine, pottery etc, and some other wagon, pay no attention to that one. What’s your fascination with my secret wagon of mystery? Don’t you worry about that. That’s Captain Grantham’s responsibility. Don’t worry about the magic inside, or what’s inside the magic bag. That’s fine. Just sit up next to Brian and hear him jabber on until you want to kill him. What are those mysterious songs to Sune, to love and beauty that you hear, or that humanoid figure briefly glimpsed? Not your problem. Just get the wagons to the Lenoir Brothers and the silks to the Lenor Brothers.
This rain won’t let up. We’ll never cross this boggy ground. But Brian saves the day, rolling the first two of the many Nat 20s he’ll roll all evening, saving the party, solving the adventure, resolving our moral dilemmas. Is he a Mary Sue? No, he’s Brian, the mild mannered wagon driver, the hero of our story, and he’s got a long, incredibly detailed story to tell you about his Aunt Maureen’s problems with her bowels. No, don’t go into a trance controlling your invisible secret familiar, he’s just got to the most excruciating part of his third least interesting, but second longest, anecdote.
Guard Kenny Gard, the other guard, tentatively unzipped the wagon to feed the secret, bound prisoner, watched by an invisible imp familiar. This was all pretty spooky. Bit scared retelling it to be honest. But there were also weasels and mage hands and all sorts, as the least trustworthy security a wagon train has ever hired rifles through any stuff that’s not nailed down..
Eventually our possible Hannibal Lecter emerges from the wagon and makes his way to the magic bag, on the face of it calm and reasonable. But he’s wanted for murder, of the captain’s son amongst others, and so as the captain readies to strike the captain is popped in an illusory box and the prisoner is bound in grasping vines and we talk it all through.
The general consensus is that murder is pretty bad, however much of a cool guy he might seem. Our only dissenters are our CN Tiefling, and Bodhi just doesn’t know. He’s been doing a lot of persuading bandits to turn to farming or locking up Robin Hoods for corrupt authorities lately, and it just doesn’t sit right with him, man. But, whatever you guys want to do. Enlightenment tells us this world is nothing but a dream. Everything’s an illusion. Nothing is real.
Samuel Wade, our handsome artist and poet, the very model of a modern bandit captain, has a hothead for a deputy, Billy Harcourt, and he’s hot on our trail. Will our heroes make it to Daring?
An ambush avoided by shrinking, grease and spikes, our pursuers are outrun by a final skill challenge of survival, luck, religion, Brian and a liiiiiittttle bit of horse doping just at the end there. We make it safely to Daring, Samuel is thrown in the gaol, for now, Billy shakes his fist, a stash of top notch narcotics are consumed, and our story draws to a close. The good guys have won!
Or have they? The camera zooms in on Brian, and Brian smiles a mysterious smile. This all worked out just as he intended.
Pop: Gnome Ranger
Allo: Gnome Monk
Harrow Hallfeather: Halfling Wizard
Bodhi: Radical Beach Dwarf
Tiny party so far, so to get us up to the weight limit: Big Blue: Firbolg Wild Magic Mage
Tina: Tiefling Great Old One Warlock disguised as half elf
Hired as wagon protection by Gerald “Mr Nighttime” to guard a wagon of silks, medicine, pottery etc, and some other wagon, pay no attention to that one. What’s your fascination with my secret wagon of mystery? Don’t you worry about that. That’s Captain Grantham’s responsibility. Don’t worry about the magic inside, or what’s inside the magic bag. That’s fine. Just sit up next to Brian and hear him jabber on until you want to kill him. What are those mysterious songs to Sune, to love and beauty that you hear, or that humanoid figure briefly glimpsed? Not your problem. Just get the wagons to the Lenoir Brothers and the silks to the Lenor Brothers.
This rain won’t let up. We’ll never cross this boggy ground. But Brian saves the day, rolling the first two of the many Nat 20s he’ll roll all evening, saving the party, solving the adventure, resolving our moral dilemmas. Is he a Mary Sue? No, he’s Brian, the mild mannered wagon driver, the hero of our story, and he’s got a long, incredibly detailed story to tell you about his Aunt Maureen’s problems with her bowels. No, don’t go into a trance controlling your invisible secret familiar, he’s just got to the most excruciating part of his third least interesting, but second longest, anecdote.
Guard Kenny Gard, the other guard, tentatively unzipped the wagon to feed the secret, bound prisoner, watched by an invisible imp familiar. This was all pretty spooky. Bit scared retelling it to be honest. But there were also weasels and mage hands and all sorts, as the least trustworthy security a wagon train has ever hired rifles through any stuff that’s not nailed down..
Eventually our possible Hannibal Lecter emerges from the wagon and makes his way to the magic bag, on the face of it calm and reasonable. But he’s wanted for murder, of the captain’s son amongst others, and so as the captain readies to strike the captain is popped in an illusory box and the prisoner is bound in grasping vines and we talk it all through.
The general consensus is that murder is pretty bad, however much of a cool guy he might seem. Our only dissenters are our CN Tiefling, and Bodhi just doesn’t know. He’s been doing a lot of persuading bandits to turn to farming or locking up Robin Hoods for corrupt authorities lately, and it just doesn’t sit right with him, man. But, whatever you guys want to do. Enlightenment tells us this world is nothing but a dream. Everything’s an illusion. Nothing is real.
Samuel Wade, our handsome artist and poet, the very model of a modern bandit captain, has a hothead for a deputy, Billy Harcourt, and he’s hot on our trail. Will our heroes make it to Daring?
An ambush avoided by shrinking, grease and spikes, our pursuers are outrun by a final skill challenge of survival, luck, religion, Brian and a liiiiiittttle bit of horse doping just at the end there. We make it safely to Daring, Samuel is thrown in the gaol, for now, Billy shakes his fist, a stash of top notch narcotics are consumed, and our story draws to a close. The good guys have won!
Or have they? The camera zooms in on Brian, and Brian smiles a mysterious smile. This all worked out just as he intended.