Gardens of Sinew and Bones - 10/07/2024 - Mendal Recounts

The elderly human wizard took the piece of paper his dwarven cleric friend had handed to him. On the piece of paper were notes. Notes for a sermon idea the dwarf had. The wizard, Archie, had been asked to give his thoughts on the notes. Holding the paper in hand, Archie began to look over the notes.

…

Cleric of Moradin - Sermon on Trust AKA Don’t Be a Trusting Fool!

Intro:

• Ask congregation rhetorical question: “Isn’t trust in the community great?”
• Congregation voices agreement. Agree back with them in showy way.
• Next rhetorical question: “Trusting people outside of your community is also great, right?”
• Hear expected so-so agreement from crowd. Agree back with them that; ‘yeah it should be fine.’
• Final rhetorical question: “So if someone you don’t know offers you a lot of money to do something strange and likely dangerous, should you do it?”
• Wait for the ‘Nos’ and then ambush them with, “and yet people do it anyway, don’t they?”
• Tell story about some adventurers - point out how even these strong servants of the community can be fooled, so you must be vigilant to scammers!

Story bit:

• The adventurers saw a notice too good to be true - first concern!
• One of them was possessed for a bit too - very dodgy!
• They found a note in a recently hung corpse - second warning of scam!
• They dug up a grave - third warning - digging up graves always wrong!
• They released a dangerous monster - should have been final warning!
• They had to be verbally warned twice not to repeat their actions - point out how money addles everyone’s brains
• Then even though they tried to do the right thing - another monster was unleashed!

Wrap-Up:

• Get forgiveness from the crowd for being too headstrong to reverse the decision to unleash more monsters quicker. The toffee-nosed prick was being condescending after all!
• Talk about how this all relates to craftsmanship and how dedicating yourself to a craft, or just appreciating fine craftsmanship keeps you away from scammers
• Make the craftsmanship bits last 10 minutes
• Done
• Leave before congregation members can ask too many annoying questions
• Pint of ale post sermon reward

…

Archie pointed at Mendal’s fifth point on the sheet, ‘Final rhetorical question’. “I would point out that your note here says ‘ask final rhetorical question’ and then after asking said question, the next note directly below has you asking, rhetorically, “and yet people do it anyway, don’t they?”

“Fuck off you pedantic old git!” Mendal said in response, not taking the criticism well. “Give me your thoughts on the sermon - that’s what I want from you.”

The corners of Archie’s pointy moustache lifted as he smiled to himself. Archie glanced back at Mendal’s notes one last time before giving his verdict, “I mean, yes a sermon on why trust is good, but don’t be so trusting that you can be taken advantage of, is a nice nuanced sermon to give. I don’t feel you’ve mentioned why trust is actually good though. However, you’ve mentioned lots about being a useful idiot. You also write about tying everything into craftsmanship, but then that note there,” Archie pointed at a note further down the list, “‘make it [craftsmanship] last 10 minutes.’” Archie looked accusingly at Mendal before saying “this note makes it look like you’re planning on winging a large portion of your sermon.”

“Yes I am going to wing that bit,” Mendal said plainly, seeing nothing wrong with his note. “I’m good at crafts and good at talking about it, too.”

Archie was both unimpressed with his friend, and at the same time unbothered having expected such an answer. “You know, I’m not certain who benefits more from you rarely making an appearance at the temple - you or the public?”

“Ha!” Kavel said, smiling a little, as he walked into the room having heard Archie’s sarcastic comment.

“Whatever boys,” Mendal said to the joker and his audience, “they’ll love my sermon. And if they don’t? So what? Maybe it’s not the sermon they want, but it’s the sermon they need!”

Kavel leant over Archie’s shoulder to read Mendal’s notes. When Kavel reached the bit about adventurers he asked, “is this about the adventure a few days ago where your party helped the demon cult, Hekrati, unleash a couple of freaky vampire creatures?”

“I see everyone’s a literary critic in this household,” Mendal said tersely.

“Yes of course it is,” Archie said smiling at Kavel, pleased at Kavel’s observation.

“Speaking of which,” Archie added, turning to face Mendal, and as Kavel sat down, “will you be following up the clue for Bloody Creek and the buried monstrosity there?”

“Mmmmmm,” Mendal considered audibly. “I think the young lad Pyrin, the aarokocra detective might follow that up. He was dead pissed off at how we were used. He’ll probably need some back up. I feel I should go. But, that toffee-nosed prick d’Artagnian from House de Silva has probably dealt with the Bloody Creek one.” Or atleast, Mendal felt he must have done so.

“Unlikely, isn’t it?” Archie questioned. “You said thanks to Kem’s deception, Kem managed to keep the location clue note you found in a poor man’s corpse.”

“Bollocks. Good point,” Mendal agreed, annoyed by the truth. “Still, Hekrati have got crossbowmen, and a scary masked lady leader, who’s probably all deadly, demon magic from head to toe. Not sure if me, Pyrin, Kem and Fin are up for a fight with that lot, if it comes to it. Although, Fin seems alright with talking to ghosts mind you, which even for adventurers of the non-clerical persuasion, I find odd. But then again, bards will talk to anyone won’t they? Any audience is fine with them.”

“Wilhelm Von Wald?” Archie asked, as Kavel looked at him inquisitively.

“Yeah, that was the ghost’s name,” Mendal responded as a question for Archie popped into his head, “do you know any of them? Von Walds, de Silvas even? Your family’s fancy, you must run in those circles.”

“I’m afraid I’m not familiar with those families. I could look into it though.” Archie began to write a note to himself on that very point as Kavel lifted his head from thought and pointed at Mendal.

“Zola’s plate armour,” Kavel began as he pointed. “Mendal, the adamantine gothic plate armour with the chandelier back attachment that you removed.”

“Yeah?” Mendal’s attention was captured by hearing about the armour he helped adapt with his crafting skills to better suit Zola’s tastes, and also to simply remove the gothic superfluous nonsense that was a chandelier on plate. “What of it?”

“I got that armour after my party dealt with Johannes Von Wald by the creepy lake on the Von Wald estate. The armour was Johannes Von Wald’s and the crying sibling as we were returning home, that must have been the ghost you saw, Wilhelm Von Wald.”

“Oh bugger me, yes!” Mendal said, surprised at the connection. “Wilhelm was in tears when he mentioned Johannes would have known what to do about the monsters. Then when someone asked if Johannes could help, Wilhelm started crying buckets, and then vanished. Moradin almighty, if Wilhem saw you there, Kavel, he’d have screamed his head off!”

“What do the Von Wald’s have to do with Hekrati?” Kavel asked, and Archie showed his interest too.

“I don’t know boys. But fuck me. I suppose I’m in this mess. I might have to find out. Eh?”

Mendal looked up at Archie and Kavel, and saw their nodded agreement.