Post by Andy D on Jan 18, 2024 22:17:49 GMT
Back the Right Horse Or Just Any Horse Actually
“You pair of godless heathens need to start saying your prayers each night!” Mendal shouted at Kavel and Archie both sat around the kitchen table with him.
Mendal had recently come back from the Fugue Plane, the plane your soul ends up in once you die, and the location from where, after around ten days of drifting, one of three fates awaited your eternal soul. Firstly, if you were faithful and/or good; you would be granted access to your god’s heavenly realm. If, however, you were faithless; you would be judged, and likely bonded to the City of Judgement’s wall, The Wall of the Faithless. Lastly, and the worst fate, if you were deemed, ‘false’, for betraying your god; eternal punishment would be your fate. There was though a fourth option for your soul in the Fugue Plane, possibly more enticing if you were destined for the wall or for punishment, and that was to accept a deal by a visiting devil on a recruitment drive.
“Doesn’t matter which deity you pick actually, just pick one,” Mendal explained, selling how easy it could be for his two friends to make the change in their lives. “You two aren’t halfway bad. You’ve both done a chunk of good by defending the Dawnlands - though you both dropped the ball with Vorsthold recently. But you,” Mendal pointed his pint at Kavel, “you’ve punched a bunch of big, evil, nasty dragons to death.” Mendal then pointed his pint at Archie, “and you… well you haven’t helped in any of the big calamities here have you? But you’ve been involved in this big cosmic archwyrm vs. primordial business too; that’s got to have earned you a spot in someone’s heaven, I’d imagine.”
“So our souls are eternally safe then,” Archie concluded.
“Well, probably yes.” Mendal agreed, “I’m fairly certain any goliath or human deity would find room for the pair of you in their corner of heaven. But get yourselves some insurance; back a god!”
“The Ram-Lord,” Kavel said, “Kavaki. All goliaths believe in him, the guardian and creator of half-giants. Us goliaths revere nature, the mountains. But we all worship Kavaki, too.”
“Never once heard you mention him. But, there you go then, that’s you.” Mendal responded disbelievingly. The only thing he had seen Kavel worship were kettlebells. But Mendal was satisfied to hear Kavel name a deity.
“And you?” Mendal said looking at the older of his two friends.
“I’ve always been partial to the deity of creativity, Lathander, ever since I was a little boy,” Archie began saying. “But when I started studying the arcane, Mystra began to fascinate me, and perhaps I owe a lot to her.”
“You only need one,” said Mendal. “Probably best to pick, they might get jealous. Then again, maybe having multiple faiths means extra insurance. So, when you arrive at the Fugue Plane, you’ll have a line of representatives offering you the way to many different heavens. No idea if that cracks the system though.”
“So, your lesson here is; I’ve been to the Fugue Plane. Pick a god, any god - doesn’t really matter which one,” Archie summarised sarcastically before also adding, “will this be part of a sermon you’ll give at the Dwarven Temple, if you ever actually step inside there again?”
“Oh fuck!” Mendal exclaimed, as a thought dawned on him. His hands reached up to hold the top of his head. “When they learn I’ve been to the Fugue Plane there’ll be no end of fucking questions; is Gond right to worship, brother Mendal, are you certain?! Did you see my Harold while you were there? Is there any food during those ten days, won’t I go hungry? - Fuck my life!”
Kavel and Archie shared a look between them. They were both very familiar with their friend’s dislike for ordinary cleric work.
“It’s just part of your divine blessing, Mendal. Why do you hate it?” Kavel had begun to ask, before Mendal, head in hands, responded, “because a forge cleric; forges! I shouldn’t have to deal with temple-goers”
Archie smiled at his frustrated friend and joked, “you say Moradin favours you. But if his divine blessing and the more basic work it entails causes you so much grief, I’m not so sure you are his favourite.”
The Fugue Plane
“Even more devoid of emotion than the Shadowfell, boys,” Mendal exclaimed to Kavel and Archie. “Not bad though really, just bland. Very, very bland. Beers’ probably tasteless.”
“So you saw Desathrax?” Kavel asked, eager to hear about the cursed dragon he helped stop a year ago.
“Yes, I did.” Mendal said, his eyes widening and mouth tightening. “That Orianna, crafty negotiator. Like I said to you the day you reminded me who Desathrax was, I wouldn’t have agreed to join her if she had mentioned a bloody great ancient dragon before I accepted to go.”
“You fought Desathrax then? So did Carric or Nevarra take control of you?” Kavel asked, as Mendal’s eyes narrowed for a second. Archie caught the shift in Mendal’s face, and giggled to himself.
Kavel did not feel it insensitive to essentially say that he did not believe Mendal could face Desathrax, and so would have needed the magic of his elven hammers to take control of his body and fight for him. Archie could see that Mendal did think it was insensitive.
“No.” Mendal responded curtly. “Neither,” he added, and gave Archie an angry glare, knowing full well what he was laughing at. “Wouldn’t have needed them.” Or so Mendal claimed. “The team wasn’t half bad anyway. I hear Orianna’s got some good star magic stuff. I’ve fought alongside Calla and Frigus before, they’re solid. Matches? You say he’s good with fire magic. Human dragon or something like that, right Archie?”
“That’s right.” Archie responded.
Mendal’s more serious expression gave way to a big grin as he remembered something. “Oh he shut up real fast when I mentioned your shopping trip in front of his ‘bakers’, Orianna. Ha! Went from giving me lip to switching the topic just like that, ha-ha!”
“What was he giving you lip about, I wonder?”
“Oh I was taking the piss. Matches mentioned he didn’t follow any god and a bunch of us were explaining the three options you get in the Fugue Plane. I had put it to him that since he was godless, he was on his way to option two; becoming a wall feature. And then I said that since we would be visiting the Fugue Plane, if he was lucky, Kelemvor might let him pick his spot on the wall ahead of time, hahahahaha!”
Archie sighed a little. “He may have been having a small crisis and you found some humour in it.”
“Ah come on! If he burns a few bad dragons, I’m sure he’ll get a ticket to good dragon heaven. Hey, he’s even met this big archwyrm now, Azhural. Azhural seems to be chief of the dragon area in the City of Judgement, and will probably put a good word in for Matches, as we helped Azhural with his Desathrax problem.”
“But you didn’t fight Desathrax?” Kavel asked, very curious how Mendal dealt with the big evil dragon.
“Oh yes. Well Azhural needed a suitable delegate to guard Desathrax in his cage, because whilst Azhural had it covered, it took up the entire day, since Desathrax has been very angry and sulky, and a real shit to handle ever since your group killed him. There was a candidate for the job, name of Klaus, Dawnland adventurer from the early days it seems. I offered to use the Fabricate spell to make him some good armour and weapons to replace the tat he had. But, in the end, during the little job ceremony Azhural performed, Azhural magic’ed up some new gear for Klaus himself. I still made Klaus a couple of shovels though. He wanted those for some reason.”
“And if Klaus is now guarding Desathrax, freeing up Azhural’s time… did Azhural reward you at all? Perhaps with his key?” Archie asked anxiously, aware that the archwyrm keys are important .
“Yes, yes that’s right. Another key was earned. Apparently this one allows you to cast a more powerful version of the Speak with Dead spell. Apparently you can go batshit crazy with it, if you’re not careful. Then again I thought that would be obvious - for example, if you use magic to carry on an argument with somebody who died, you’re clearly mad. Let the dead rest in peace, and yourself!”
“If used unsensibly in that way, yes, I would agree,” Archie said, agreeing in part with Mendal, before asking a question that had worried him about his friend’s travel to a plane involved in the Archwyrm and Primordial matter. “Mendal, has there been any side effects from travelling to and from the Fugue Plane?”
Mendal was used to taking the piss out of his more elderly human friend at the drop of a hat. But, although he saw the invite to rib Archie about the sudden ageing he experienced when he ventured to the Plane of Time, Mendal uncharacteristically chose to not joke about his friend’s age, when he replied, “no, Archie. It’s alright old boy. No side effects, as far as I can tell.”
…
Unfortunately for Mendal and the other adventurers who visited the Fugue Plane, they are all unaware that they should be more careful than ever with their lives for the next month or so. Necrotic energy from the Fugue Plane has made it more likely they will perish from fatal injuries.