Post by Beets The Beetle (Feenix) on Sept 6, 2023 12:00:03 GMT
In the kitchen of The Beetle Base, Beets lays perched on a favourite rafter in a spot of summer sunlight reading up on her draconic phrases as Gary, The Rooftop Beetles housekeeper and self-appointed chef-clanks up one of his culinary ‘delights.’
*Clang clang clatter*
Hmm now where has that gone. Pfft-ow! Don’t tell me he’s used it again. Beets! Hey Beets?”
““Ƕʍʍ..చհąէ’ʂ էհąէ?-*Growly Cough* "Oh sorry Gary-something wrong?
“Yeah I can’t find my potato masher. It’s bad enough when Jeremy doesn’t wash it after using it to mash bananas for his breakfast smoothies, but now I can’t find it at all!”
“Hm,” says Beets turning the page of her notebook to start reading through a list of saucy draconic compliments. “Well I’m sure it’ll turn up, you can use mine for now if you like, just look in the cupboard next to the glasses.” She gestures with a point of a beetle toed foot, her eyes not leaving the page.”
*Creak*
“Beets..is this..A Dwarven Warhammer?!”
“Hm? Oh yeah-I guess it is. I got it in Vorsthold last week.”
“Wh-what? You’ve been Vorsthold?! But aren’t they like, super reclusive?-I don’t think I know anybody that's been there-though there was that band that played here last year from there I think. The Thundercrackors?
“Oh yeah, they sounded pretty good. Well it was a urgent job from Jenna. Turns out they had a beholder blasting the city with magic beams that they wanted us to take care of.
“A b-beholder?! You mean those weird floating ball mouths with about a gazillion eye balls.”
“Yeah thats the kind. It’s okay though, my friend Lucia practically ripped it to shreds. Funny though, when I met my first one that was trying to brainwash Aurelia it didn’t try shooting off any eye lasers at all.”
*WHAM!*
“AAARGGGH-F-CMGK! Oooghghmmm.”
“Oh, are you okay?!" Beets glances over to see Gary sucking his thumb, the pot of
unscathed potatoes on the countertop watching him mockingly with their own many eyes.
“Mgh f-fine!” Gary gums through his thumb. “Ouch..D-did you say Aurelia?-Council Head Aurelia?!””
“Yeah that’s her. Though back then I was more bothered about rescuing her from becoming a brain-juice Pina-colada than what we were actually facing! Did you know beholders can shoot a beam from their eyes that can turn you to dust? I nearly got hit by two of’em!
“Beets, your adventurers never sound very safe.”
“-Not any more unsafe than eating your cooking.-“ Beets muttered quietly as her tongue twitched from the memory of Gary’s last culinary experiment. Guts’n’all fish pie.
“What was that?
“I said what’s cooking chef?”
“Oh mashed potato surprise.” Gary added with a broad smile.
“W-whats the surprise-and aren’t you supposed to take the skins off? Beets said scrutinising the still slightly mud flecked steamed spuds from her perch.
“Oh that’s to keep in the flavour!” Gary added, sprinkling a far too generous helping of salt over the spuds as he spoke. “And as for the surprise I thought I’d nip down to that Goblin butcher and see what end of the day summer offers he’s got on.
Beets nostrils retract and her stomach squirms as she recalls flying over that particularly pungent stall on the very edge of The Dawn Market a couple weeks back.
“Oh-would you look at the time!!” She suddenly exclaims, making a big performance of pulling out and flipping open her planer pocket watch. “I’m gonna be late for my draconic lesson class with Booysa!”
“But-isn’t that tomorrow?” Gary asks, glancing over at the large planner pinned by Diana to the beetle delivery board.
“W-well it doesn’t hurt to be early-See you later Gary!” Beets says with a barely wave before she flits up and out the skylight quicker than a beholders blink.
“Oh well-more for the others I guess. Okay spuds, prepare to meet your masher!”
*WHAM*
"AGGH! MY EYE!"
