“The Yuan Where The Gang Gets Rich”
Mar 6, 2018 23:45:36 GMT
Nowhere, Dvärgar / Gara, and 4 more like this
Post by Deleted on Mar 6, 2018 23:45:36 GMT
“The Yuan Where The Gang Gets Rich”
A silent movie written by Lachlan Thorne A.C.E.
Starring Leocanto, Erik, Dvärgar, Anwen, Elbereth, Flick, Daisy, and Will
Directed and produced by Andy
**FADE IN**
INT. LOCATION #1 - DAY
The Ettin. A diverse group of nine adventurers standing around a notice board, looking at one notice in particular. No words are spoken. They nod solemnly and silently at one another. That’s 45 separate nods. It takes a while. They need a long rest.
**FADE OUT**
**FADE IN**
EXT. LOCATION #1 – DAY
Wide-frame panning shot. The same group is walking down a deserted road. All day. The light slowly fades as they go.
EXT. LOCATION #2 – NIGHT
The group has made camp. A minor interaction during the night with a minor character – VALENTA, DROW.
EXT. LOCATION #3 – DAY
The party awakes to find Will, one of the 17 bards in the group, missing. The Paladin character’s dog picks up the scent and a frantic chase ensues. **CUE MUSIC**
EXT. LOCATION #4 – LATER THE SAME DAY
The group finds a large stone snakehead and approach it, following the trail. As they near it, a huge stone construct rears up from behind and attacks them.
The group eventually defeats it, destroying an expensive piece of the set; budget for this episode is now through the roof.
INT. LOCATION #2 – SAME DAY
The group ventures further into the large structure, which begins spiralling down. CUT TO: Will, shackled in a cell with a number of creatures: four Orcs, three Xvart, and Gnoll Edmunds.
Will frees himself and the other prisoners, and rushes out – rounding a corner and humorously colliding with the rest of the group. CUE PRAT FALLS AND OTHER SLAPSTICK.
The group moves further underground, finally turning off the main corridor through a side door. They enter a room and are confronted by a number of cultists and Yuan-ti.
CUE FIGHT SCENE MONTAGE, including:
➢ Leocanto turning into a giant ape and totally one-shotting a Golem
➢ Erik, Dvärgar, and Anwen getting stuck in and butchering anyone in their way
➢ Elbereth fighting magic with magic
➢ Flick chasing down and dispatching a fleeing enemy wizard (maybe the one who cast silence on this movie?)
➢ Daisy taking down cultists and cutting out tongues
➢ Will dancing on a table
**FADE OUT**
Final scene: a tiny xvart walks out and holds up a giant intertitle card informing the audience that:
“A load of magical items were found and divvied up; the cultists were interrupted in unlocking a Yuant-ti weapon, but one member of the cult escaped, twirling its moustache as it went; a load of skeleton skulls were sold for $4,500 and profit split EQUALLY between the party; and two quirky bags of holding were discovered!”
And the Oscar for best director goes to Andy for holding it all together and delivering a storming performance on the night!
**EDIT: one of the producers backed out, so total salary budget was cut to $4,500: %500 each. The union has been contacted.
