The River Part Two, Silvia - (18/05/22)
May 24, 2022 15:25:44 GMT
Ser Baine Cinderwood 🔥🌼, Lykksie, and 5 more like this
Post by Wixspartan on May 24, 2022 15:25:44 GMT
She sits in a cathedral. It’s dark, and thousands upon thousands of candles are lit all around her. The vast ceiling is high enough that she can’t even see it. From the dark, a pair of eyes blink open, watching her silently. Then another pair. Then another. And another. Her prayers were heard - and now they’re watching, and waiting. Expectantly, excitedly. Eagerly. With pride and trepidation. Through a window she sees the beginnings of a sunrise, and a male voice speaks.
“Your time will come, child.”
It is later, she looks at the sky, the light glinting on two tears that slowly trickle down her face. She takes a metal disk out of her pocket and throws it at the sky, not watching where it lands. How did it come to this. She remembered the river of fire, the pavilion, the platform above which floated the man they had come to save, a string of magic connecting him to the orb. She remembered everyone gearing up, summoning allies and shielding themselves from the evil that was about to hit them. She also remember the pavilion slowly shifting into a giant daemon of fire and fury, marching over the river fully ablaze. Zah'Rahnin was the first to swoop towards them, and Silvia remembered shouting something about everyone else going on ahead whilst she dealt with the creature. Fucking moron, she almost died even with Kavel next to her and Velania healing her with the light of Selune. Fucking Selune, just as guilty as the devils for this cycle of death and violence. No, she shouldn't think like that, her girlfriend was an acolyte of Selune and it was Selune's blessings that had kept her alive in more than one fight. It was all too easy to blame the gods though, all too easy to blame higher powers for the actions of foolish humans who were so desperate to prove their worth to themselves that they would follow the woman they loved into hell. She shouldn't have gone, she had slowed them all down. After all, she almost died facing Zah'Rahnin despite getting only a single hit on them. She remembered blacking out and coming to in Kavel's wounded arms, remembered being able to see nothing but the massive Goliath's chest as she heard a barrage of attacks meant for her being absorbed by his defiant back. She really should get him something, not some cheap present but something real, a token of her appreciation after all those times he had been her rock, her defender. They had won, she remembered that at least. She had almost been in a trance when they returned, the Jackal's wings carrying them from hell back to Portal Plaza. She hadn't even payed attention as the woman asked about their mission, she had just left, she needed to get home. She was so tired.
Silvia returns from the street, the tears gone. She closes the door silently, with a flick of her fingers her tongue twists and she speaks through the house unintelligibly to everyone except the small fox she knows is hiding somewhere within.
"Kela? Be a good girl and go prowling for me, if you can find a rat you'll get extra liver tomorrow morning. I have to do something and need you out of the house for a bit sweetie."
There is a rustle and the pale white fox slinks into the entryway and out the door, Silvia's forced smile even worse than usual as the fox leaves. Once Kela is gone it drops, the look of defeat returning. She moves from the entryway to the bedroom upstairs and finds the only bit of floor large enough. What did he want? Candles? The smoke would be symbolic. She knows she just has to think to talk to him but these things needed a sense of ceremony, these were important discussions after all. She sets up a circle of candles and summons Shadowclaw before laying it across her crossed legs. She closes her eyes and thinks.
"Kurtz, your servant seeks to contact you, there is something I wish to discuss."
The ancient voice resonates in her mind.
"Silvia my dear, I hope you are well, I hope you found that happiness. What is it that I can do to help you?"
"I wish to speak of our pact, you said that it was not forever, despite what I had previously believed."
"The pact could be broken, yes, although most of my powers would remain with you. They are a gift that I cannot take back. Is this something you wish to pursue? Do you still have reservations about my intent or dedication?"
"I... have reservations about my own place in the world, about who I am. I have dedicated so much of myself to being your champion but even with that I feel... aimless. I don't know if I can be your servant anymore."
"Few are given a place in this world. Most of us have to carve it out. Decide for ourselves where we can thrive. If it is direction and guidance you seek then I remain here whenever you wish to ask, but I know no better and can see no further into the future than you. That is why I left you with the instruction to find happiness. It is one of the few things in this world truly worth fighting for."
"Happiness? And how do I do that huh? My girlfriend went to fucking hell on a suicide mission and I went with her because I was worried if I didn't she might die. In the fucking process I almost got another friend killed because I was too weak. I can't figure out how to just get 'happiness' Kurtz, and I don't think your powers are helping anymore."
"You have a girlfriend? Thats wonderful. And imagine if you hadn't been there with your powers? Would they have been better or worse off than they are right now? No one just 'gets' happiness. It is earned. It is fought for. It doesn't last but every second you have it is worth the pain. And if you find the right people, they will help you get it back."
"They would have been better off without me, I almost got them killed, I now feel like shit. That's not happiness Kurtz. But now I can't just sit and cook food, seven years has killed any chance of normalcy."
"I care for you greatly, but I don't believe they would have been better off without you."
She can almost feel the tiredness in his voice, she doesn't care.
"But lets say you are right. What is your plan? If I escape this place, make it to you, break our bond and leave you to your own devices. Then what?"
"Then... I find another life, I focus somewhere else. I live without turning invisible whenever I'm too scared to be seen, without my first instinct to summon a spear of black metal and crush people with arcane force. I still want to fight, but not like this."
"As I said, to simply break the curse would leave you with those powers. To remove my gifts, that requires more complex, more powerful magics. But if you wish it, nI give you my word. When I have done what I can for Delilah, when we meet again in person, I will show you what must be done to severe our tie completely."
There is a moment of silence.
"..Thank you then, I will see you around then Kurtz, it has been an honour."
Silvia sighs and quickly puts out the candles, laying them on their side just to ensure any trace of her draconic patron has left. Not that she doesn't like him, she almost loves him, but his presence may offend her next guests. Carefully she lays out several symbols, a gauntlet with an eye on its back, a road heading towards a sunrise, a silvery blue-white star, a set of scales upheld by a skeletal hand and a coin with a fair woman's face on it. That last one especially had cost her more, Waukeenites were certainly a driven bunch. She willed her breathing slower and began to pray.
"Gods, I beseech thee look upon this lost soul. Whoever may be watching over my soul, I ask you to come before me as I come before you. I seek your wisdom, your guidance, and your forgiveness. Please do not ignore my pleas, I know someone can hear me."
Silvia takes a moment to listen to the silence. It's a particular skill, a task that not many have mastered - to listen even when there is nothing to listen to. Her thoughts swirl, settle and grow quiet in the back of her mind. A short eternity passes of nothing but stillness. She tries not to think of it as emptiness.
Then there is a small tugging in her chest, a shortness of breath she cannot place the source of. Her eyelids flicker and suddenly she is back in the cathedral, the dreamspace she visited briefly on their way back from Phlegethos. The thousands of candles dance and flicker around her, and all around, through the massive stained glass windows, eyes blink open to look at her.
There's a feeling of expectancy, like last time. They are watching. They are waiting to see what she will do. She tries again to slow her breathing and stands, facing the expectant eyes.
"You know who I am, Silvia Veltaire, daughter of Horace Veltaire, private of the town guard, resident of Daring Heights. I have called for your aid, for I am lost."
There is a gust of wind buffeting her suddenly, swirling around her. When it dies down, it becomes whispers, thousands of voices speaking to her from all around, from the dark corners and from inside her mind.
"We know, child. Your path is hidden. You have stopped your journey. You are not at a crossroads - you stand in a open field."
Images flash in her mind. Snippets of her own life, but also lives of others, of people she loves and hates and know well and very little of.
"Where will you turn? What do you seek?"
She clenches a fist.
"I have asked so many times, so many people. Every time the question has come back on me, has come back to my decisions. I have made my decisions, and I have suffered. I do not wish to be given more fields, I simply wish for someone to show me a path, a solid path, a long path."
"We can give you thousands of paths, but you must choose where the path will lead. You must choose a path that you will not stray from. A path you can follow to the end of your journey. Tell us, child. Where do you want your path to take you?"
Silvia begins to cry.
"I don't know anymore, I don't know. I can't choose a path anymore, I feel as if I am blind. I just want to make sure the people I know and care about can live their lives in peace, I want people around me to be happy, I want to be happy. Nothing I do seems to bring me back from the precipice of death and heartbreak. I do not care anymore if I must suffer, but I want to bring more than death into the world."
Two sets of eyes shut behind the large glass windows. Three remain. In one window, a gauntleted hand grasps a sword firmly, solidly. An eye beholds her from the back of the hand, seeking her. The gaze is cold and distant, but steadfast beyond anything she's ever experienced in her life.
In another window, a woman's face wreathed in shadow appears to her, too ancient and powerful to truly behold. She is magic, and might, and knowledge, and preparedness and determination. She is misunderstood, and loathed, and judged. And she stands above it all.
In the last window, a sun rises slowly over the world, offering it a new beginning. A new chance for peace, prosperity, light and love. It offers her a chance to hold on to the good and the warmth, to preserve it all, and vows to never rescind the offer.
"We can show you the path, child. You must choose it yourself, and you must walk it yourself. But you will not walk it alone."
She is shaking now, almost unable to see through confused and anguished tears. Then, as if in a trance, she slowly walks towards the certainty of the sun, letting the light wash over her and clean her fears. She looks towards the sword and gauntlet and gives it a nod, almost as if thanking it for some great deed it has done her before, but does not stray from her path. The images in the other two windows fade - the woman first, and more slowly the gauntlet. She feels it regard her still as she faces the sun, feels a certainty that it will watch over her yet, should she ever need it.
The sun rises further and the glass shatters in the frame. A warm wind blows out the thousands of candles in the cathedral as the sun illuminates the grey stone around her. The tightening in her chest, the inexplicable shortness of breath fades suddenly, and she takes several deep breaths of fresh air.
"The path lies before you. It is yours to walk, but never to walk alone. Seek the Dawn Knight - my Valerian champion. He will guide you through the first steps."
She smiles, properly, her eyes bathed with sunlight, empty of the usual darkness. A stronger wind rushes around her, not cold but brisk. Her hair is a mess, her tears drying on her cheeks, and the brilliance of the sun is dazzling, blinding. And then the vision fades. She's is back in her bedroom. There is nothing different around her, nothing has changed within. But she can feel sunlight on her face still. She sits for a second more, savouring the feeling. Tomorrow she shall leave the curtains open.
Then she remembers, Sorrel will be home soon. She carefully cleans the room with its many candles and incense, carefully putting the symbols away except for two. She places the symbol of Lathander on her windowsill before going downstairs and hanging the gauntlet over the inside of her front door.
Sorrel slumps against Silvia’s door and just manages to slide the key into the lock. As she opens the door she hears strange singing. Happy singing, and the sound of splashing water coming from the kitchen area. Sorrel stands in the doorway and listens to Silvia’s voice in quiet amazement. It is the first time she has heard her sing, and the last time she saw Silvia she was hurrying away from Portal Plaza in what Sorrel had assumed was pain or sorrow. Hell had not been kind to Silvia. Which, Sorrel smiles, on reflection, is rather the point about Hell. But this voice, the cascading water, is exactly what Sorrel needs to hear as she tries to set her thoughts in order. She lowers her pack softly to the ground and lets the music soak through her. In the kitchen Silvia stands smiling over a full sink, slowly washing bandages in soapy water, she turns as Sorrel enters the main room and beams with the light of the sun.
"You're home! Sit down, get that armour off, let's get you patched up hey?"
“Don’t stop,” Sorrel says.
“I can manage the armour and the patching but I don’t got the singing.”
She eases her smoke and blood stained leather chest piece off and lays it near the door then checks her side reflexively. The mark is still gone.
“You sound happy.”
Silvia chuckles.
"Good senses as always. I'm happy yes, because I'm alive and so are you."
She continues singing.
"Well, yes, and I am happy for the same reasons," Sorrel nods.
"But you didn't sing when you fell into bed from some mystical light, or... well, on all the other occasions that one or other of us could have been killed but survived." Sorrel reflects.
"Because if you did, you'd be singing like this every morning."
Silvia stops halfway through a verse and giggles.
"Well, I'm usually a lot less hopeful. But I've come to think that maybe, just maybe, the both of us are going to be ok for once. Not because we're fighting to keep ourselves alive but because things will let up a little."
She turns and looks at Sorrel and the smile lessens a little, although it remains in the eyes.
"I'm sorry darling I must sound mad, but then again maybe it's just because I tend not to be very pleasant to be around most days."
Sorrel hesitates.
"How would you define let up a little, otherwise perfect creature," she wrinkles her nose.
"Had you left the plaza when they told us we were about to be invaded by gith riding on dragons?"
"That's the Dawnlands' problem to deal with, not us Sorrel. Sure we can help but it's not our problem, it's not us that the fate of the fucking world seems to lie on, let alone the fate of our own lives. It's the Dawnlands, of which we can be as much a part of as we need to."
Sorrel nods.
"I mean, I understand that we're talking about different forms of problem here," she says carefully.
"Obviously interpersonal dynamics and the likelihood of giant fire breathing lizards incinerating the kitchen are clearly unrelated in a very important sense. But I wonder if we can honestly say the fate of our own lives - given said on rushing horde - is entirely an opt-in/opt-out scenario. However, I think I'm missing the point. There's a subtext to what you said, and I've slightly failed to grasp it despite my three years as chief intero... interviewer for the... for some people."
Silvia chuckles again.
"I knew you'd overthink things as usual, but I love you nonetheless so hey-oh what can one do. Sorrel what I'm saying is that whilst we need to go help with the invasion and the dragons and whatever, we're not going to be the pivot, we can choose when we need to fight and we can choose when we need to rest and recover. No more long nights staying up using gods know what potions and concoctions. Now, as to why I feel perhaps a little less cynical than my usual self despite being in a lot of fucking pain and being very very tired after everything. I have spoken to several people, and discovered several things."
She sighs.
"First I spoke to Kurtz, I may.... be leaving his service soon."
Sorrel raises an eyebrow but thinks it better not to interrupt Silvia’s flow.
"Yes, I know, surprise surprise the person who seems so insistent that a contract with no escape is never fair has decided to leave her contract with only one escape. But... I don't feel like I'm who I was when I first took his hand, and I don't feel he is part of who I am anymore. I think I may have found a new path, I'll still be me, I'll still love you, but I think it is time I walk a new path."
“Is this still part of ‘first’?”
"No, no that was firmly second. I appear to have caught a bad case of religion."
“It happens. Velania did it for me, bless her.”
"You have of course heard of the Morninglord? Well, it seems he has heard of me, and he has outstretched his hand to me, offered me new light. I have been told to seek the Dawn Knight, know who that might be?"
Sorrel scratches her head.
“No, I can’t say I’ve heard the name. Isn’t there a temple or something?”
"I don't know, guess my first step is to find out."
Silvia laughs.
"A puzzle indeed. Now, you're not bandaging yourself young lady you're letting me help, I didn't receive medic training in the guard for nothing."
She marches over with fresh dry bandages like a lady on a mission. Sorrel suddenly sits up and Silvia stops.
“Wait… the Dawn Knight… I do know them. Or at least, their dog.”
"Their dog, Sorrel you know how that sounds right?"
“Can’t a girl ride a flying dog wearing golden shoes whilst drunk without exciting comment any more?”
"Ok so that's another day's story as to how exactly you got into that situation but- sorry could you lift your arm darling?- sorry as I was saying would you know where to find this Dawn Knight? Or maybe their dog?"
“They found me really… I got the feeling they knew more about what I wanted than I did. It was after a night drinking with Varga and I needed fresh air and… well there they were.”
"Huh, maybe I just need to stand outside the back of a tavern then, act drunk- sorry this might hurt- and wait for them to turn up ey?"
Silvia grins as she continues tending to her.
“I think it’s the wanting they respond to. Things you don’t know… it was the Dawn Knight’s dog that sent us to Hell.”
Silvia’s smile drops.
“Ah. I see.”
“I mean, the thing with gods is, if they want you to do something it’s very rarely - pop along and find this artefact,” Sorrel muses.
“It tends to be a little more on the grandiose side. Your decision has clearly made you very happy and I support you completely. But if a god reaches out to you, it’s not going to be a casual check in. These are gods. Ineffable. Irritatingly and, of course, adorably ineffable. Hold tight, would be my suggestion. And if the Morninglord wants you, embrace the love but sharpen your sword.”
Silvia nods, determined.
"I will, I will set out in dawn's light, seems poetic. Both of us need some sleep first though, as always the bed upstairs is as much yours as it is mine, your bandages should be fine too as long as you change them in the morning, with any luck you should also wake up to a delicious breakfast, although I will likely be gone so just sleep in and get some rest for me."
She leans down and kisses Sorrel on the cheek.
"I'm glad you're alive Sorrel, I wouldn't accept anything else from the world."
Sorrel smiles and shakes her head. Of all the extreme events she has encountered since arriving in this continent - Hell, the Abyss, Shadowfell, the Hunger Spirit, the Feywild... the list is endless... Sorrel Darkfire catching an early night in her girlfriends house and waking to breakfast is the most unlikely of them all...
Silvia sleeps a restless sleep, but it’s still a good sleep. She dreams of a rushing wind, and things growing in the earth.
She is woken just before dawn by pins and needles in her entire body. Like electric ants crawling under her skin. She’s filled with an urgency, a need to go somewhere, do something, but she’s not sure where or what. As soon as she sits up in the bed, a thin strip of the early rays of dawn hits her in the face, and the pins and needles stop. Carefully she slips out of bed and gets changed into simple travelling clothes before packing simple rations and a change of clothes into a backpack and heading down to the kitchen. Trying to put away the feeling of urgency as much as she can she quickly prepares a simple porridge cooking on the still gently flickering stove before inserting a few more pieces of wood to keep it going. Then she grabs her travelling cloak and steps out the front door into the morning light. The urgency fades a little as she squints into the pale sunrise, and she grits her teeth with determination. She got these boots resoled recently and they’ve served her well for years. She’s used to walking, why stop now? She makes quick work of the streets, weaving her way south East but avoiding the busier streets. When she turns the corner from blessings st to Do’Urden she comes face to face, suddenly, without warning, with a dog.
Except it’s the size of a grizzly bear.
She freezes for a second before grinning.
“Guess you’re my ride then? Thanks for not making me get drunk first, I don’t do well with alcohol and flying as I’ve recently discovered.”
It gives a quiet bark in reply but it’s large enough and close enough - towering over her - that she feels it reverberate in her chest. She can see, now that the shock has worn off, that it’s wearing a massive red neckerchief around its furry neck, and what appears to be golden booties on all four paws, its tail wagging furiously. She chuckles a little.
“You may have to squat down, I’m not a jumper.”
It crouches down so she can climb on. Once up she finds some sort of rope arrangement around his chest and stomach, some sort of harness that she can hold on to hidden under all the fur. And boy does she hold on tight. He takes off. And he doesn’t so much fly - there are no wings - as he simply starts running on air, as if gravity isn’t a problem for him. He stays relatively low over the roofs of Daring, taking her back the direction she came, away from the sunrise. He runs past the temple, and heads slightly more south, landing on silver street. The massive hound comes to a stop outside what appears to be a large red building, two stories and taking up considerable space. It’s made from red brick with a single entrance into a courtyard. From inside she can hear the unmistakable sounds of soldiers; voices are calling out orders, armour and shields are rustling against weapons, heavy boots are running back and forth.
Despite the early hour there appears to be considerable activity going on. Silvia shakes her head and smiles.
"You're telling me I could have walked... five minutes down the road?"
The hound does a little shrug to set her back down on the ground and then nudges her towards the entryway before strolling into the courtyard itself. She carefully makes her way into the compound behind it, trying desperately to not be the most obvious thing to look at. She rounds a corner and is met with - in their defense - a very organized type of chaos. It's clearly a compound of soldiers of some sort, most of them wearing armour and cloaks in black and red. Some look older, harder, less frantic and more relieved to be doing something. Others look younger, like they are putting just a little too much thought into how their swords hang on their belts.
She watches them move to and fro for a moment, looking for.. something. The dog hasn't supplied her with much information to go on. Suddenly the pale light of the sunrise is blocked by a towering, looming shape. For a second she thinks the dog has returned to be wildly unhelpful but then she realizes this creature is bipedal. A minotaur of terrifying size looks down at her before politely but pointedly asking.
"Can I help you, miss?"
She looks up awkwardly.
"Um, hey, uh, came in via the dog over there and uh. Well I'm looking for the Dawn Knight."
A look of befuddled recognition passes over his face and he opens his mouth to reply but before he can get a word out, a door slams open across the yard and a booming voice calls out.
"HAS ANYONE SEEN MY FUCKING DOG?"
Silvia sheepishly raises a hand. She spots the source of the inquiry as he makes his way across the yard towards them, not so much weaving through the moving crowd but expecting them to move out of his way - which they do. They part like water around a tall and broad half-orc in dark grey clothing, a deep red cloak billowing behind him. The left side of his face is a scarred mess, making him even more imposing. His long black hair is tied up in a messy half-bun and on his head sits a flowercrown of red and yellow flowers. The Valerian Champion, Silvia recalls.
A nervous looking human woman is trying to keep pace with him.
"Ser, can't you communicate with Frankie telepathi-"
"Since when does that make a fuckin difference, Shiv, he's a little shit. Always was, doesn't matter that he's big now."
"Hello sir, um, my name's Silvia"
The minotaur looks between the half-orc and Silvia and nods to himself.
"Well, that's that sorted."
He turns and walks off, and in his wake the large hound slinks past them both. Silvia didn't know dogs could look smug. The half-orc throws his hands up in exasperation at the dog, clearly being told something telepathically.
"I don't give a shit! We're being invaded! You can't just take off- What do you mean Evelyn told you? Who?!"
He whips his head round suddenly, finally seeming to notice Silvia's presence.
"And who are you supposed to be?"
She stops, sighs.
"Hello sir I'm Silvia, as previously stated."
"That clears very little up I'm afraid. Did my dog kidnap you?"
"Uh, no I jumped on voluntarily"
He squints at her confused, while repeatedly shooting sour looks at the dog. He's now pawing at the woman with a massive golden bootie, looking for pets.
"Right, er.. sorry about... that."
He's pausing oddly between words, like he's listening to another voice speaking while trying to maintain a conversation with Silvia. Finally he rolls his eyes and holds up a finger at her, asking her to wait, and faces the hound.
"Evelyn told you to get this girl. And bring her here. To me. Right now."
Silvia refrains from asking the many questions on her mind. The dog looks even smugger and then winks at Silvia, before turning and walking off. The half-orc throws his hands up in further exasperation before rounding back on Silvia.
"Right. Well. Like I said, sorry about that. I'm Baine Cinderwood. Master at Arms of the Order of the Crimson Fist. I'm also - which I think might be more relevant here if my FUCKING DOG", he raises his voice to shout the last bit, "is anything to go by - sort of. A champion of the Big Lad. The Sun. Morninglord. What, uh... what can I do for you?"
"So you could say you're a Dawn Knight?"
"The."
"Yuhuh ok that narrows things down. I was told to look for you."
"By..." He raises a finger to point vaguely at the sky. ".. By the chief?"
She nods slowly. He looks increasingly confused for a moment before some sort of realization seemingly dawns on him and he suddenly looks.. humble. He scratches a little awkwardly at the scars on his face and searches for the right words.
"So you're.. new to the whole deal?"
"I mean I've worshipped since I was a kid but new to the whole getting visions and such yeah."
"Oh shit, you're at the vision stage? Cool. Right. Got the tinglies?"
"And I thought I was special and unique..."
"Well, to be fair, not everyone gets them. There's a whole pack of paladins of Lathander around - set up shop outside of town, big ass pavilion - as far as I can tell the tinglies and the.. well, stressful visions an' such only seem to happen when you sort get on board later in life...?"
He squints at her again.
"He didn't by any chance tell you what I was supposed to do with you?"
"I presumed he told you, I'm simply trying to find my path."
"Ah. Well, no. Busy man, I guess. Gotta shuffle the sun around the sky an' all that."
He raises a sarcastic eyebrow again.
"He does however seem to have seen fit to tell one of his angels who told.. my dog."
"That answers two of my questions then. Sorry, trying to do less of the sarcasm and dryness honest, I can leave most of my old life behind but not that I guess.."
"No worries, mate, I've been told numerous times that my amount of cursing 'isn't befittin' a man of my position and is a bad representation of the Morninglord'"
He grins at her, his face suddenly transforming from gruesome to friendly, almost handsome.
"Inside tip from me to you - big lad don't give a fuck."
"Thank fuck, I would turn around and leave now if that were the case... not really actually."
He lets out a loud laugh, almost as booming as the massive dog's bark, and claps a heavy hand on her shoulder. She only flinches slightly.
"What about the questions I didn't answer?"
"What do I do now I think is the pressing one"
He looks at her consideringly and for a moment Silvia feels incredibly scrutinized. He's looking at her with a practiced eye, reading her like a book, and the heavy hand leaves her shoulder to poke her gently in the arm.
"Well. You don't look like someone who likes to get into scraps. Caster?"
"Somewhat, I can hold my own with a weapon though. Call it a hybrid style."
"Rapier?"
"Trident, for now, trained on lots of things though, mainly halberds"
She smirks.
"Although Kela did always like our one on one sessions to be more rapier focused yes"
He looks impressed at the mention of a halberd.
"Shit, alright. So. I'm sure you're aware we're about to get fuckin' invaded by astral pirates on bloody dragons. We - the Order - are helping with the evacuation and then mobilising to head over to the Fort. I'm - to my massive, constant surprise - one of the people in charge of this sorry lot. So I gotta do that for a little bit. Are you goin' to be around for when the shit goes down?"
"Maybe, probably, I need to sort myself out first though."
She gestures to her head.
"Shit going on, old patron needs to be let go, need to calm down and take a breather after a trip to hell and almost dying, the usual."
He nods with full understanding, not questioning her statement in the slightest.
"Yeah, I know how that goes. And that sounds sensible. If you're gonna follow Him, you gotta be free to do it."
He rubs an absentminded thumb over his left palm, worrying at something there.
"I'll be honest, I'm not entirely sure where to start with showin' you the ropes."
He gestures around the yard at the soldiers still milling about.
"My usual teachins might not be what's needed. So why don't we do this, you sort what needs sortin'. A patron, eh? Not the easiest thing to walk away from. Have you got people helpin' you? Watchin' your back?"
"Used to, she's pretty much disappeared though. Sorrel will always have my back but she's got her own stuff and honestly I don't want her tied up in everything going on with my patron."
"Sorrel? I think I know her - ran into her at the Pits a while back. Good people."
He gives her a surprisingly soft smile.
"And if I've learned anythin' in this life it's that the people who love us are tangled up no matter what. Sometimes tryin' to protect them by keepin' them away is only gonna make things worse. Take the help, Silvia."
She sighs and smiles faintly.
“Guess you’re right. But the patron thing is still out of my hands unfortunately. I just have to sit and wait, feels like shit honestly but I’m trying to stay positive. I’ve got something I’m running to now not just running from.”
He nods, still smiling. He looks almost a little bit nostalgic.
"Yeah, that's the good shit. Keep runnin' towards the stuff you want."
He gestures vaguely to the sky again.
"He'll show you the way. And I know waitin's just absolute shit. But now you got someone who'll keep you company while you wait."
He hesitates for a moment, like he's not sure about his own ability to form the words he wants to say.
"The thing about Him is that no matter what happened yesterday, He lets you start over today. Part of goin' where He's goin' isn't to set your baggage down and run away from it - it's to find a way to keep walkin' with it. We all have bullshit, Silvia. And He doesn't mind. So get workin' on your patron and until you can get that sorted, try to make some peace with all the bullshit. He'll help you. And I will too, if I can."
Across the yard, someone calls out for him, and he looks a little sheepish.
"Sorry, I gotta make sure the squeaks don't stab themselves with their shiny new blades. That might have been a pile of empty words, I dunno. He brought me peace, Silvia. He's the reason I can do some absolutely horrid shit to protect people and not want to crawl out of my own skin each night. The sun rises, every day. And we begin again."
“We begin again, still us but more able to face who we are and keep going…”.
She seems lost in thought as the half orc leaves and aimlessly walks slowly back to her home, she has a lot of waiting to do it seems. He hears her words, and shoots her a genuine smile and a nod over his shoulder, even as he's walking away and the anxious woman returns to badger him with questions. She gives a last glance across the yard and sees the massive hound laying on the ground, his head on his paws, watching her with golden, glowing eyes. The pins and needles shoot down her arms a final time, and she turns to leave...
"All that I want
Is to wake up fine
Tell me that I'm alright
That I ain't gonna die."
-Paramore
“Your time will come, child.”
It is later, she looks at the sky, the light glinting on two tears that slowly trickle down her face. She takes a metal disk out of her pocket and throws it at the sky, not watching where it lands. How did it come to this. She remembered the river of fire, the pavilion, the platform above which floated the man they had come to save, a string of magic connecting him to the orb. She remembered everyone gearing up, summoning allies and shielding themselves from the evil that was about to hit them. She also remember the pavilion slowly shifting into a giant daemon of fire and fury, marching over the river fully ablaze. Zah'Rahnin was the first to swoop towards them, and Silvia remembered shouting something about everyone else going on ahead whilst she dealt with the creature. Fucking moron, she almost died even with Kavel next to her and Velania healing her with the light of Selune. Fucking Selune, just as guilty as the devils for this cycle of death and violence. No, she shouldn't think like that, her girlfriend was an acolyte of Selune and it was Selune's blessings that had kept her alive in more than one fight. It was all too easy to blame the gods though, all too easy to blame higher powers for the actions of foolish humans who were so desperate to prove their worth to themselves that they would follow the woman they loved into hell. She shouldn't have gone, she had slowed them all down. After all, she almost died facing Zah'Rahnin despite getting only a single hit on them. She remembered blacking out and coming to in Kavel's wounded arms, remembered being able to see nothing but the massive Goliath's chest as she heard a barrage of attacks meant for her being absorbed by his defiant back. She really should get him something, not some cheap present but something real, a token of her appreciation after all those times he had been her rock, her defender. They had won, she remembered that at least. She had almost been in a trance when they returned, the Jackal's wings carrying them from hell back to Portal Plaza. She hadn't even payed attention as the woman asked about their mission, she had just left, she needed to get home. She was so tired.
Silvia returns from the street, the tears gone. She closes the door silently, with a flick of her fingers her tongue twists and she speaks through the house unintelligibly to everyone except the small fox she knows is hiding somewhere within.
"Kela? Be a good girl and go prowling for me, if you can find a rat you'll get extra liver tomorrow morning. I have to do something and need you out of the house for a bit sweetie."
There is a rustle and the pale white fox slinks into the entryway and out the door, Silvia's forced smile even worse than usual as the fox leaves. Once Kela is gone it drops, the look of defeat returning. She moves from the entryway to the bedroom upstairs and finds the only bit of floor large enough. What did he want? Candles? The smoke would be symbolic. She knows she just has to think to talk to him but these things needed a sense of ceremony, these were important discussions after all. She sets up a circle of candles and summons Shadowclaw before laying it across her crossed legs. She closes her eyes and thinks.
"Kurtz, your servant seeks to contact you, there is something I wish to discuss."
The ancient voice resonates in her mind.
"Silvia my dear, I hope you are well, I hope you found that happiness. What is it that I can do to help you?"
"I wish to speak of our pact, you said that it was not forever, despite what I had previously believed."
"The pact could be broken, yes, although most of my powers would remain with you. They are a gift that I cannot take back. Is this something you wish to pursue? Do you still have reservations about my intent or dedication?"
"I... have reservations about my own place in the world, about who I am. I have dedicated so much of myself to being your champion but even with that I feel... aimless. I don't know if I can be your servant anymore."
"Few are given a place in this world. Most of us have to carve it out. Decide for ourselves where we can thrive. If it is direction and guidance you seek then I remain here whenever you wish to ask, but I know no better and can see no further into the future than you. That is why I left you with the instruction to find happiness. It is one of the few things in this world truly worth fighting for."
"Happiness? And how do I do that huh? My girlfriend went to fucking hell on a suicide mission and I went with her because I was worried if I didn't she might die. In the fucking process I almost got another friend killed because I was too weak. I can't figure out how to just get 'happiness' Kurtz, and I don't think your powers are helping anymore."
"You have a girlfriend? Thats wonderful. And imagine if you hadn't been there with your powers? Would they have been better or worse off than they are right now? No one just 'gets' happiness. It is earned. It is fought for. It doesn't last but every second you have it is worth the pain. And if you find the right people, they will help you get it back."
"They would have been better off without me, I almost got them killed, I now feel like shit. That's not happiness Kurtz. But now I can't just sit and cook food, seven years has killed any chance of normalcy."
"I care for you greatly, but I don't believe they would have been better off without you."
She can almost feel the tiredness in his voice, she doesn't care.
"But lets say you are right. What is your plan? If I escape this place, make it to you, break our bond and leave you to your own devices. Then what?"
"Then... I find another life, I focus somewhere else. I live without turning invisible whenever I'm too scared to be seen, without my first instinct to summon a spear of black metal and crush people with arcane force. I still want to fight, but not like this."
"As I said, to simply break the curse would leave you with those powers. To remove my gifts, that requires more complex, more powerful magics. But if you wish it, nI give you my word. When I have done what I can for Delilah, when we meet again in person, I will show you what must be done to severe our tie completely."
There is a moment of silence.
"..Thank you then, I will see you around then Kurtz, it has been an honour."
Silvia sighs and quickly puts out the candles, laying them on their side just to ensure any trace of her draconic patron has left. Not that she doesn't like him, she almost loves him, but his presence may offend her next guests. Carefully she lays out several symbols, a gauntlet with an eye on its back, a road heading towards a sunrise, a silvery blue-white star, a set of scales upheld by a skeletal hand and a coin with a fair woman's face on it. That last one especially had cost her more, Waukeenites were certainly a driven bunch. She willed her breathing slower and began to pray.
"Gods, I beseech thee look upon this lost soul. Whoever may be watching over my soul, I ask you to come before me as I come before you. I seek your wisdom, your guidance, and your forgiveness. Please do not ignore my pleas, I know someone can hear me."
Silvia takes a moment to listen to the silence. It's a particular skill, a task that not many have mastered - to listen even when there is nothing to listen to. Her thoughts swirl, settle and grow quiet in the back of her mind. A short eternity passes of nothing but stillness. She tries not to think of it as emptiness.
Then there is a small tugging in her chest, a shortness of breath she cannot place the source of. Her eyelids flicker and suddenly she is back in the cathedral, the dreamspace she visited briefly on their way back from Phlegethos. The thousands of candles dance and flicker around her, and all around, through the massive stained glass windows, eyes blink open to look at her.
There's a feeling of expectancy, like last time. They are watching. They are waiting to see what she will do. She tries again to slow her breathing and stands, facing the expectant eyes.
"You know who I am, Silvia Veltaire, daughter of Horace Veltaire, private of the town guard, resident of Daring Heights. I have called for your aid, for I am lost."
There is a gust of wind buffeting her suddenly, swirling around her. When it dies down, it becomes whispers, thousands of voices speaking to her from all around, from the dark corners and from inside her mind.
"We know, child. Your path is hidden. You have stopped your journey. You are not at a crossroads - you stand in a open field."
Images flash in her mind. Snippets of her own life, but also lives of others, of people she loves and hates and know well and very little of.
"Where will you turn? What do you seek?"
She clenches a fist.
"I have asked so many times, so many people. Every time the question has come back on me, has come back to my decisions. I have made my decisions, and I have suffered. I do not wish to be given more fields, I simply wish for someone to show me a path, a solid path, a long path."
"We can give you thousands of paths, but you must choose where the path will lead. You must choose a path that you will not stray from. A path you can follow to the end of your journey. Tell us, child. Where do you want your path to take you?"
Silvia begins to cry.
"I don't know anymore, I don't know. I can't choose a path anymore, I feel as if I am blind. I just want to make sure the people I know and care about can live their lives in peace, I want people around me to be happy, I want to be happy. Nothing I do seems to bring me back from the precipice of death and heartbreak. I do not care anymore if I must suffer, but I want to bring more than death into the world."
Two sets of eyes shut behind the large glass windows. Three remain. In one window, a gauntleted hand grasps a sword firmly, solidly. An eye beholds her from the back of the hand, seeking her. The gaze is cold and distant, but steadfast beyond anything she's ever experienced in her life.
In another window, a woman's face wreathed in shadow appears to her, too ancient and powerful to truly behold. She is magic, and might, and knowledge, and preparedness and determination. She is misunderstood, and loathed, and judged. And she stands above it all.
In the last window, a sun rises slowly over the world, offering it a new beginning. A new chance for peace, prosperity, light and love. It offers her a chance to hold on to the good and the warmth, to preserve it all, and vows to never rescind the offer.
"We can show you the path, child. You must choose it yourself, and you must walk it yourself. But you will not walk it alone."
She is shaking now, almost unable to see through confused and anguished tears. Then, as if in a trance, she slowly walks towards the certainty of the sun, letting the light wash over her and clean her fears. She looks towards the sword and gauntlet and gives it a nod, almost as if thanking it for some great deed it has done her before, but does not stray from her path. The images in the other two windows fade - the woman first, and more slowly the gauntlet. She feels it regard her still as she faces the sun, feels a certainty that it will watch over her yet, should she ever need it.
The sun rises further and the glass shatters in the frame. A warm wind blows out the thousands of candles in the cathedral as the sun illuminates the grey stone around her. The tightening in her chest, the inexplicable shortness of breath fades suddenly, and she takes several deep breaths of fresh air.
"The path lies before you. It is yours to walk, but never to walk alone. Seek the Dawn Knight - my Valerian champion. He will guide you through the first steps."
She smiles, properly, her eyes bathed with sunlight, empty of the usual darkness. A stronger wind rushes around her, not cold but brisk. Her hair is a mess, her tears drying on her cheeks, and the brilliance of the sun is dazzling, blinding. And then the vision fades. She's is back in her bedroom. There is nothing different around her, nothing has changed within. But she can feel sunlight on her face still. She sits for a second more, savouring the feeling. Tomorrow she shall leave the curtains open.
Then she remembers, Sorrel will be home soon. She carefully cleans the room with its many candles and incense, carefully putting the symbols away except for two. She places the symbol of Lathander on her windowsill before going downstairs and hanging the gauntlet over the inside of her front door.
Sorrel slumps against Silvia’s door and just manages to slide the key into the lock. As she opens the door she hears strange singing. Happy singing, and the sound of splashing water coming from the kitchen area. Sorrel stands in the doorway and listens to Silvia’s voice in quiet amazement. It is the first time she has heard her sing, and the last time she saw Silvia she was hurrying away from Portal Plaza in what Sorrel had assumed was pain or sorrow. Hell had not been kind to Silvia. Which, Sorrel smiles, on reflection, is rather the point about Hell. But this voice, the cascading water, is exactly what Sorrel needs to hear as she tries to set her thoughts in order. She lowers her pack softly to the ground and lets the music soak through her. In the kitchen Silvia stands smiling over a full sink, slowly washing bandages in soapy water, she turns as Sorrel enters the main room and beams with the light of the sun.
"You're home! Sit down, get that armour off, let's get you patched up hey?"
“Don’t stop,” Sorrel says.
“I can manage the armour and the patching but I don’t got the singing.”
She eases her smoke and blood stained leather chest piece off and lays it near the door then checks her side reflexively. The mark is still gone.
“You sound happy.”
Silvia chuckles.
"Good senses as always. I'm happy yes, because I'm alive and so are you."
She continues singing.
"Well, yes, and I am happy for the same reasons," Sorrel nods.
"But you didn't sing when you fell into bed from some mystical light, or... well, on all the other occasions that one or other of us could have been killed but survived." Sorrel reflects.
"Because if you did, you'd be singing like this every morning."
Silvia stops halfway through a verse and giggles.
"Well, I'm usually a lot less hopeful. But I've come to think that maybe, just maybe, the both of us are going to be ok for once. Not because we're fighting to keep ourselves alive but because things will let up a little."
She turns and looks at Sorrel and the smile lessens a little, although it remains in the eyes.
"I'm sorry darling I must sound mad, but then again maybe it's just because I tend not to be very pleasant to be around most days."
Sorrel hesitates.
"How would you define let up a little, otherwise perfect creature," she wrinkles her nose.
"Had you left the plaza when they told us we were about to be invaded by gith riding on dragons?"
"That's the Dawnlands' problem to deal with, not us Sorrel. Sure we can help but it's not our problem, it's not us that the fate of the fucking world seems to lie on, let alone the fate of our own lives. It's the Dawnlands, of which we can be as much a part of as we need to."
Sorrel nods.
"I mean, I understand that we're talking about different forms of problem here," she says carefully.
"Obviously interpersonal dynamics and the likelihood of giant fire breathing lizards incinerating the kitchen are clearly unrelated in a very important sense. But I wonder if we can honestly say the fate of our own lives - given said on rushing horde - is entirely an opt-in/opt-out scenario. However, I think I'm missing the point. There's a subtext to what you said, and I've slightly failed to grasp it despite my three years as chief intero... interviewer for the... for some people."
Silvia chuckles again.
"I knew you'd overthink things as usual, but I love you nonetheless so hey-oh what can one do. Sorrel what I'm saying is that whilst we need to go help with the invasion and the dragons and whatever, we're not going to be the pivot, we can choose when we need to fight and we can choose when we need to rest and recover. No more long nights staying up using gods know what potions and concoctions. Now, as to why I feel perhaps a little less cynical than my usual self despite being in a lot of fucking pain and being very very tired after everything. I have spoken to several people, and discovered several things."
She sighs.
"First I spoke to Kurtz, I may.... be leaving his service soon."
Sorrel raises an eyebrow but thinks it better not to interrupt Silvia’s flow.
"Yes, I know, surprise surprise the person who seems so insistent that a contract with no escape is never fair has decided to leave her contract with only one escape. But... I don't feel like I'm who I was when I first took his hand, and I don't feel he is part of who I am anymore. I think I may have found a new path, I'll still be me, I'll still love you, but I think it is time I walk a new path."
“Is this still part of ‘first’?”
"No, no that was firmly second. I appear to have caught a bad case of religion."
“It happens. Velania did it for me, bless her.”
"You have of course heard of the Morninglord? Well, it seems he has heard of me, and he has outstretched his hand to me, offered me new light. I have been told to seek the Dawn Knight, know who that might be?"
Sorrel scratches her head.
“No, I can’t say I’ve heard the name. Isn’t there a temple or something?”
"I don't know, guess my first step is to find out."
Silvia laughs.
"A puzzle indeed. Now, you're not bandaging yourself young lady you're letting me help, I didn't receive medic training in the guard for nothing."
She marches over with fresh dry bandages like a lady on a mission. Sorrel suddenly sits up and Silvia stops.
“Wait… the Dawn Knight… I do know them. Or at least, their dog.”
"Their dog, Sorrel you know how that sounds right?"
“Can’t a girl ride a flying dog wearing golden shoes whilst drunk without exciting comment any more?”
"Ok so that's another day's story as to how exactly you got into that situation but- sorry could you lift your arm darling?- sorry as I was saying would you know where to find this Dawn Knight? Or maybe their dog?"
“They found me really… I got the feeling they knew more about what I wanted than I did. It was after a night drinking with Varga and I needed fresh air and… well there they were.”
"Huh, maybe I just need to stand outside the back of a tavern then, act drunk- sorry this might hurt- and wait for them to turn up ey?"
Silvia grins as she continues tending to her.
“I think it’s the wanting they respond to. Things you don’t know… it was the Dawn Knight’s dog that sent us to Hell.”
Silvia’s smile drops.
“Ah. I see.”
“I mean, the thing with gods is, if they want you to do something it’s very rarely - pop along and find this artefact,” Sorrel muses.
“It tends to be a little more on the grandiose side. Your decision has clearly made you very happy and I support you completely. But if a god reaches out to you, it’s not going to be a casual check in. These are gods. Ineffable. Irritatingly and, of course, adorably ineffable. Hold tight, would be my suggestion. And if the Morninglord wants you, embrace the love but sharpen your sword.”
Silvia nods, determined.
"I will, I will set out in dawn's light, seems poetic. Both of us need some sleep first though, as always the bed upstairs is as much yours as it is mine, your bandages should be fine too as long as you change them in the morning, with any luck you should also wake up to a delicious breakfast, although I will likely be gone so just sleep in and get some rest for me."
She leans down and kisses Sorrel on the cheek.
"I'm glad you're alive Sorrel, I wouldn't accept anything else from the world."
Sorrel smiles and shakes her head. Of all the extreme events she has encountered since arriving in this continent - Hell, the Abyss, Shadowfell, the Hunger Spirit, the Feywild... the list is endless... Sorrel Darkfire catching an early night in her girlfriends house and waking to breakfast is the most unlikely of them all...
Silvia sleeps a restless sleep, but it’s still a good sleep. She dreams of a rushing wind, and things growing in the earth.
She is woken just before dawn by pins and needles in her entire body. Like electric ants crawling under her skin. She’s filled with an urgency, a need to go somewhere, do something, but she’s not sure where or what. As soon as she sits up in the bed, a thin strip of the early rays of dawn hits her in the face, and the pins and needles stop. Carefully she slips out of bed and gets changed into simple travelling clothes before packing simple rations and a change of clothes into a backpack and heading down to the kitchen. Trying to put away the feeling of urgency as much as she can she quickly prepares a simple porridge cooking on the still gently flickering stove before inserting a few more pieces of wood to keep it going. Then she grabs her travelling cloak and steps out the front door into the morning light. The urgency fades a little as she squints into the pale sunrise, and she grits her teeth with determination. She got these boots resoled recently and they’ve served her well for years. She’s used to walking, why stop now? She makes quick work of the streets, weaving her way south East but avoiding the busier streets. When she turns the corner from blessings st to Do’Urden she comes face to face, suddenly, without warning, with a dog.
Except it’s the size of a grizzly bear.
She freezes for a second before grinning.
“Guess you’re my ride then? Thanks for not making me get drunk first, I don’t do well with alcohol and flying as I’ve recently discovered.”
It gives a quiet bark in reply but it’s large enough and close enough - towering over her - that she feels it reverberate in her chest. She can see, now that the shock has worn off, that it’s wearing a massive red neckerchief around its furry neck, and what appears to be golden booties on all four paws, its tail wagging furiously. She chuckles a little.
“You may have to squat down, I’m not a jumper.”
It crouches down so she can climb on. Once up she finds some sort of rope arrangement around his chest and stomach, some sort of harness that she can hold on to hidden under all the fur. And boy does she hold on tight. He takes off. And he doesn’t so much fly - there are no wings - as he simply starts running on air, as if gravity isn’t a problem for him. He stays relatively low over the roofs of Daring, taking her back the direction she came, away from the sunrise. He runs past the temple, and heads slightly more south, landing on silver street. The massive hound comes to a stop outside what appears to be a large red building, two stories and taking up considerable space. It’s made from red brick with a single entrance into a courtyard. From inside she can hear the unmistakable sounds of soldiers; voices are calling out orders, armour and shields are rustling against weapons, heavy boots are running back and forth.
Despite the early hour there appears to be considerable activity going on. Silvia shakes her head and smiles.
"You're telling me I could have walked... five minutes down the road?"
The hound does a little shrug to set her back down on the ground and then nudges her towards the entryway before strolling into the courtyard itself. She carefully makes her way into the compound behind it, trying desperately to not be the most obvious thing to look at. She rounds a corner and is met with - in their defense - a very organized type of chaos. It's clearly a compound of soldiers of some sort, most of them wearing armour and cloaks in black and red. Some look older, harder, less frantic and more relieved to be doing something. Others look younger, like they are putting just a little too much thought into how their swords hang on their belts.
She watches them move to and fro for a moment, looking for.. something. The dog hasn't supplied her with much information to go on. Suddenly the pale light of the sunrise is blocked by a towering, looming shape. For a second she thinks the dog has returned to be wildly unhelpful but then she realizes this creature is bipedal. A minotaur of terrifying size looks down at her before politely but pointedly asking.
"Can I help you, miss?"
She looks up awkwardly.
"Um, hey, uh, came in via the dog over there and uh. Well I'm looking for the Dawn Knight."
A look of befuddled recognition passes over his face and he opens his mouth to reply but before he can get a word out, a door slams open across the yard and a booming voice calls out.
"HAS ANYONE SEEN MY FUCKING DOG?"
Silvia sheepishly raises a hand. She spots the source of the inquiry as he makes his way across the yard towards them, not so much weaving through the moving crowd but expecting them to move out of his way - which they do. They part like water around a tall and broad half-orc in dark grey clothing, a deep red cloak billowing behind him. The left side of his face is a scarred mess, making him even more imposing. His long black hair is tied up in a messy half-bun and on his head sits a flowercrown of red and yellow flowers. The Valerian Champion, Silvia recalls.
A nervous looking human woman is trying to keep pace with him.
"Ser, can't you communicate with Frankie telepathi-"
"Since when does that make a fuckin difference, Shiv, he's a little shit. Always was, doesn't matter that he's big now."
"Hello sir, um, my name's Silvia"
The minotaur looks between the half-orc and Silvia and nods to himself.
"Well, that's that sorted."
He turns and walks off, and in his wake the large hound slinks past them both. Silvia didn't know dogs could look smug. The half-orc throws his hands up in exasperation at the dog, clearly being told something telepathically.
"I don't give a shit! We're being invaded! You can't just take off- What do you mean Evelyn told you? Who?!"
He whips his head round suddenly, finally seeming to notice Silvia's presence.
"And who are you supposed to be?"
She stops, sighs.
"Hello sir I'm Silvia, as previously stated."
"That clears very little up I'm afraid. Did my dog kidnap you?"
"Uh, no I jumped on voluntarily"
He squints at her confused, while repeatedly shooting sour looks at the dog. He's now pawing at the woman with a massive golden bootie, looking for pets.
"Right, er.. sorry about... that."
He's pausing oddly between words, like he's listening to another voice speaking while trying to maintain a conversation with Silvia. Finally he rolls his eyes and holds up a finger at her, asking her to wait, and faces the hound.
"Evelyn told you to get this girl. And bring her here. To me. Right now."
Silvia refrains from asking the many questions on her mind. The dog looks even smugger and then winks at Silvia, before turning and walking off. The half-orc throws his hands up in further exasperation before rounding back on Silvia.
"Right. Well. Like I said, sorry about that. I'm Baine Cinderwood. Master at Arms of the Order of the Crimson Fist. I'm also - which I think might be more relevant here if my FUCKING DOG", he raises his voice to shout the last bit, "is anything to go by - sort of. A champion of the Big Lad. The Sun. Morninglord. What, uh... what can I do for you?"
"So you could say you're a Dawn Knight?"
"The."
"Yuhuh ok that narrows things down. I was told to look for you."
"By..." He raises a finger to point vaguely at the sky. ".. By the chief?"
She nods slowly. He looks increasingly confused for a moment before some sort of realization seemingly dawns on him and he suddenly looks.. humble. He scratches a little awkwardly at the scars on his face and searches for the right words.
"So you're.. new to the whole deal?"
"I mean I've worshipped since I was a kid but new to the whole getting visions and such yeah."
"Oh shit, you're at the vision stage? Cool. Right. Got the tinglies?"
"And I thought I was special and unique..."
"Well, to be fair, not everyone gets them. There's a whole pack of paladins of Lathander around - set up shop outside of town, big ass pavilion - as far as I can tell the tinglies and the.. well, stressful visions an' such only seem to happen when you sort get on board later in life...?"
He squints at her again.
"He didn't by any chance tell you what I was supposed to do with you?"
"I presumed he told you, I'm simply trying to find my path."
"Ah. Well, no. Busy man, I guess. Gotta shuffle the sun around the sky an' all that."
He raises a sarcastic eyebrow again.
"He does however seem to have seen fit to tell one of his angels who told.. my dog."
"That answers two of my questions then. Sorry, trying to do less of the sarcasm and dryness honest, I can leave most of my old life behind but not that I guess.."
"No worries, mate, I've been told numerous times that my amount of cursing 'isn't befittin' a man of my position and is a bad representation of the Morninglord'"
He grins at her, his face suddenly transforming from gruesome to friendly, almost handsome.
"Inside tip from me to you - big lad don't give a fuck."
"Thank fuck, I would turn around and leave now if that were the case... not really actually."
He lets out a loud laugh, almost as booming as the massive dog's bark, and claps a heavy hand on her shoulder. She only flinches slightly.
"What about the questions I didn't answer?"
"What do I do now I think is the pressing one"
He looks at her consideringly and for a moment Silvia feels incredibly scrutinized. He's looking at her with a practiced eye, reading her like a book, and the heavy hand leaves her shoulder to poke her gently in the arm.
"Well. You don't look like someone who likes to get into scraps. Caster?"
"Somewhat, I can hold my own with a weapon though. Call it a hybrid style."
"Rapier?"
"Trident, for now, trained on lots of things though, mainly halberds"
She smirks.
"Although Kela did always like our one on one sessions to be more rapier focused yes"
He looks impressed at the mention of a halberd.
"Shit, alright. So. I'm sure you're aware we're about to get fuckin' invaded by astral pirates on bloody dragons. We - the Order - are helping with the evacuation and then mobilising to head over to the Fort. I'm - to my massive, constant surprise - one of the people in charge of this sorry lot. So I gotta do that for a little bit. Are you goin' to be around for when the shit goes down?"
"Maybe, probably, I need to sort myself out first though."
She gestures to her head.
"Shit going on, old patron needs to be let go, need to calm down and take a breather after a trip to hell and almost dying, the usual."
He nods with full understanding, not questioning her statement in the slightest.
"Yeah, I know how that goes. And that sounds sensible. If you're gonna follow Him, you gotta be free to do it."
He rubs an absentminded thumb over his left palm, worrying at something there.
"I'll be honest, I'm not entirely sure where to start with showin' you the ropes."
He gestures around the yard at the soldiers still milling about.
"My usual teachins might not be what's needed. So why don't we do this, you sort what needs sortin'. A patron, eh? Not the easiest thing to walk away from. Have you got people helpin' you? Watchin' your back?"
"Used to, she's pretty much disappeared though. Sorrel will always have my back but she's got her own stuff and honestly I don't want her tied up in everything going on with my patron."
"Sorrel? I think I know her - ran into her at the Pits a while back. Good people."
He gives her a surprisingly soft smile.
"And if I've learned anythin' in this life it's that the people who love us are tangled up no matter what. Sometimes tryin' to protect them by keepin' them away is only gonna make things worse. Take the help, Silvia."
She sighs and smiles faintly.
“Guess you’re right. But the patron thing is still out of my hands unfortunately. I just have to sit and wait, feels like shit honestly but I’m trying to stay positive. I’ve got something I’m running to now not just running from.”
He nods, still smiling. He looks almost a little bit nostalgic.
"Yeah, that's the good shit. Keep runnin' towards the stuff you want."
He gestures vaguely to the sky again.
"He'll show you the way. And I know waitin's just absolute shit. But now you got someone who'll keep you company while you wait."
He hesitates for a moment, like he's not sure about his own ability to form the words he wants to say.
"The thing about Him is that no matter what happened yesterday, He lets you start over today. Part of goin' where He's goin' isn't to set your baggage down and run away from it - it's to find a way to keep walkin' with it. We all have bullshit, Silvia. And He doesn't mind. So get workin' on your patron and until you can get that sorted, try to make some peace with all the bullshit. He'll help you. And I will too, if I can."
Across the yard, someone calls out for him, and he looks a little sheepish.
"Sorry, I gotta make sure the squeaks don't stab themselves with their shiny new blades. That might have been a pile of empty words, I dunno. He brought me peace, Silvia. He's the reason I can do some absolutely horrid shit to protect people and not want to crawl out of my own skin each night. The sun rises, every day. And we begin again."
“We begin again, still us but more able to face who we are and keep going…”.
She seems lost in thought as the half orc leaves and aimlessly walks slowly back to her home, she has a lot of waiting to do it seems. He hears her words, and shoots her a genuine smile and a nod over his shoulder, even as he's walking away and the anxious woman returns to badger him with questions. She gives a last glance across the yard and sees the massive hound laying on the ground, his head on his paws, watching her with golden, glowing eyes. The pins and needles shoot down her arms a final time, and she turns to leave...
"All that I want
Is to wake up fine
Tell me that I'm alright
That I ain't gonna die."
-Paramore
