Sometimes, Silence is the Best Answer – Merla – 12.03.2021

---

“Your mother’s assistance in your… escape from the Winter Court was the least of her crimes.”

Merla’s eyes narrow at the Lady of Silence. She didn’t have to see Elias’ face to know they were shocked by this statement. The fae-bard had been trying to detect the assassin’s thoughts for nearly a minute but all she was getting was a swirling vortex on an ice field. Even as Merla tried to grasp an understanding of the woman they were speaking to – which normally she is very good at – she was nigh impossible to read.

She did not want to jump to conclusions, but there was something about this that was nagging at her, that didn’t sit right. So when Elias looked at Merla for confirmation of any lies being told, she could not tell her friend anything useful.

So she merely shook her head once and that was it.

The Lady of Silence continued to speak, calling Queen Titania a warmonger and claiming the Winter Court’s goals are maintaining peace and balance. “The Winter Court never strikes first,” she declares, eyes briefly flicking over to Merla who stays silent.

Now is not the time for words. She must listen and see. And then she will act.

They are told of the job that would give Elias Queen Morinn’s favour: Extract an asset to the Winter Court who is currently in the vassal Court of Glory. Silence does not know their name or who they are but if they speak the words ‘winter sun’ and ‘serenity’ into consecutive sentences then the asset will know to leave with them. However, the Green Knight is on his way there now, supposedly to find and take this asset in for questioning for Queen Titania. If Elias and them are to be successful, what they do and who they are doing this job for must stay secret. They are told of another, minor objective to go along with it: If they can get their hands on Queen Titania’s mobilization plans from the Amber Duchess then they are to do so.

Elias keeps glancing at Merla but she never takes her eyes off of the Winter Court eladrin. Astra is still as stone beneath her, picking up the focused and controlled energy of her mistress.

“Every tool has its purpose and its time,” the Lady says to Elias. “I have no doubt in your ability to successfully do this.”

“What happens if Elais fails?” Merla asks. Her voice is strong, no trace of softness to be found.

“It will depend on the nature in which they fail. Obviously, the Queen will not honour their end of the bargain,” she states matter-of-factly. Again, Merla cannot read anything past the belief in the words she speaks as being absolute truth.

Then the Lady of Silence fully turns to face her. “I know you and who you claim to be. But you are not all you say you are.”

Merla does not rise to the bait, choosing to stay silent.

“I consider Merla family and I trust them,” Elias says, coming to her defence. It warms her heart knowing that her friend believes in her.

“That might not have as much weight as you think,” the Lady of Silence replies, her ice blue eyes locked on Merla’s. Then she looks between them all – Elias, Baine, Ghesh and BB – opening her hands by her sides as she says, “We are dependable and as steady as the mountain.”

“Yes. A mountain – full of secrets and fear,” Merla says to Astra.

The winged unicorn exhales a hot breath of air into the frigid, dark night.

---

As Faye scouts ahead through the mushroom forest to get a better understanding of what awaits them at the giant tree that is the Court of Glory, Baine turns to Merla.

“Listen, I don’t know much about fey politics,” the big man begins, “But I do know that the very very very fancy Summer fey, Titania, is your Mum. Are we technically robbing your Mum right now? Are you robbing your Mum?”

Merla gives a little sigh, and looks up at Astra.

“I’m not asking you to tell me how everything is,” Baine says. “I just want to make sure that you’re good.”

She doesn’t need to ask the question on her mind. Astra already knows. She dips her head a little, her version of a nod.

“If Elias decides to go after the mobilization plans then absolutely, yes,” Merla says, looking at Baine. “It is stealing information from Queen Titania, from the Summer Court. This suspected asset though…” Merla’s brow furrows. “The fact that the Green Knight is coming to get them is serious. She only sends him if it is something really important.”

“I’m less concerned about the politics of it all,” Baine repeats. “More like, are you good with this? Are you going to get in trouble? Is Faye going to get in trouble? I just want to know who I’m going to be fighting next after this fight.”

“I honestly don’t know Baine. I am here to try to help my friend get their mother back. I don’t trust the Lady of Silence, or any of their ilk. I am not saying I don’t trust Morinn – she is a different story and I do not know her. But even I do not fully understand everything that is going on, Baine. I might look like I do, but … I am trying and it is getting difficult.”

“Right. Well, I’ll go with my standard approach to things: Don’t know anything but see what happens. Cool! I just wanted to check.”

She gives him a half smile. “I appreciate that.”

“It’s hard to know what exactly we are doing here when we don’t even know who this asset is,” BB says tentatively.

“I agree with you,” Merla says, the frustration unmistakable. “I am also worried what it will mean for Elais if we do not do this. You are all as important to me as Queen Titania is. I want to see you all happy and with the ones you love.” She smiles at BB.

“I’m going to ask you a dickhead question and I’m not expecting an answer. I just want to know someone has asked you this question before you have to answer it.”

Merla feels like she knows what Baine will ask. She gives him a little nod.

“If and or when Queen Titania asks you to do something that you don’t like to the people of Daring Heights, or the Dawnlands, are you prepared to decide which side you’re going to be on?”

The imperial topaz in her circlet dances with light as she answers, her expression hard to read.

“I already know which side I will choose.”

---

Merla knew she would be too conspicuous to avoid being noticed. That’s the thing when it comes to declaring you are the Daughter of Summer. Say it enough times and it becomes a Truth that cannot be ignored. Such is the way of things in the Feywild. Words have weight, meaning, and they can shape many things.

There was also the little fact that she is now a commander of a legion of se’akhrua. When she and Baine heard the Amber Duchess was in the arena having sparring matches Merla knew exactly what sort of distraction they would be causing when they got there.

Baine was practically vibrating with anticipation.

Whilst Elias, BB and Ghesh ascended to the top of the unusually large redwood-like tree that served as the city in which the denizens of the Court lived, Merla and Baine were directed to the arena. She was keeping an eye out for the Green Knight, wondering if their paths would cross at all when the fey himself stepped through the crowd towards her.

“Lady Merla, it is good to see you,” he says, doing a formal bow. “What has brought you to the Court of Glory?”

“Green Knight, it is good to see you too,” Merla responds with a warm smile and a bow of her own. “I am here because I wished to familiarise myself with one of Summer’s vassal courts, possibly even speak with the Duchess. My companion is Ser Baine Cinderwood of the Order of the Crimson Fist. His partner is the Great Hound, Frankie.”

Baine does a soldierly nod whilst Frankie gives a small woof of greeting. The Green Knight returns the acknowledgements.

“What has brought you here?” Merla asks with a smile.

“Business for the Queen. Nothing you need to concern yourself with.”

“Oh, I hope it is nothing serious.” Merla looks at his men scanning the crowd and though her smile stays relaxed she lets her eyes grow a touch concerned. “If there is anything I can help with…”

“No, thank you. We have it under control,” the Green Knight says, kindly but firm.

“I have no doubt,” she says assuredly. “Green Knight, I do not wish to delay you but there is something I would tell you.”

He seems to stand at greater attention and though Merla cannot see his eyes, she knows he is watching her closely.

“I want you to know I do not hold any grudges or ill will towards you. After everything that has happened since my banishment has been rescinded, I have not had a chance to tell you this. You were doing your duty but you were also willing to listen. Queen Titania is very fortunate to have you by her side.”

The Green Knight smiles.

“Thank you, Lady Merla. I am glad you have returned,” he says, sincerity lending a richness to his voice.

He glances around them at the throng of fey milling about the arena’s exterior. Then he steps closer to her. Even on Astra, the Green Knight is tall. Keeping his voice low, he says, “A word of caution Lady Merla. Not everyone is going to forgive what happened as easily as others.”

“Then I will prove my worthiness through my actions,” she asserts, the light of confidence in her eyes.

“Hmm,” he intones, appraising her for a moment then giving her a nod.

Merla suspected not everyone would be so quick to forgive and forget what happened. Having it confirmed by the Green Knight only means she has more work ahead of her.

---

The arena is in a hollow among the roots of the great tree, with various fey creatures looking down and cheering on as one eladrin takes on five opponents with ease. She wears light red armour and is wielding a spear that she uses in conjunction with her fists and feet as she kicks, stabs and punches the living daylights out of the five, clearly lesser challengers. Her movements are so quick it is almost impossible to see. The last of the five falls to her spear and a cry rises from the stands.

Baine is looking between the arena and the Green Knight, clearly trying to communicate something to the fey warrior. Merla thinks she knows what he wants, and though it is a thrilling idea, and would also serve to delay the Green Knight more, she is not sure she would want to go toe-to-toe with him.

“Of course he would,” Astra says with a chuckle.

Merla sees Frankie bound down into the fighting pit and Baine slowly follows. When he gets down there, Frankie lets out the loudest, deepest bark that cuts through the cheers of the crowd. The eladrin in the red armour stops her victory lap, turning to look at the half-orc and bear sized hound that has suddenly stepped onto her stage.

Baine light’s his maul and nods to her.

“That was fucking fantastic,” he says. “But I’m not going to fight you because you would hand me my ass. You on the other hand.” Baine lifts his maul up and points it to the Green Knight. “You, I would like to fight.”

Then he leaps down the rest of the way, landing beside Frankie, the biggest grin on his face.

Merla looks over to the Green Knight and sees him stop. Then turns back towards the fighting pit and comes over to her once more.

“Well, this should be interesting,” he says, amused.

Before she can ask what he means the red lady speaks.

“I don’t know who you are, stranger, but in my court if you step into my fighting pit, you fight me.”

“Oh shit,” Merla and Astra think to each other at the same time.

Baine blinks and then barks out a laugh.

“You know what, that’s on me, cause I didn’t ask. Sure, let’s do it! I’m sure I’ll learn something from you slapping me about.”

“Do you want an assist?” Merla says casting a quick message to Baine.

“I mean… Yeah.”

She laughs and turns to the Green Knight.

“I can’t let him have all the glory now can I?”

Astra takes a few steps forward then leaps up into the air. They do a circle overhead, making sure everyone gets a chance to see who she is, before Astra gracefully lands beside Baine and Frankie.

“I will also challenge you.”

The crowd gives a resounding, Ooo. The Amber Duchess points her spear at Merla, her voice carrying easily through the arena as she speaks.

“You are the Lady Merla. You are the one who skewered Arvel Morningdew. Now there is someone I would have liked to fight. Alright.” She grins. “I will accept your challenge. Two on one. Let’s see how this goes. We fight till the last blood or until you tap out.”

The crowd cheers. Glancing up, Merla sees the Green Knight looking down at them, watching her. She gives him a nod, his words of warning in the forefront of her mind. Then everything else falls away as she turns back to face the Amber Duchess. Amber twirls her spear and shifts into a fighting crouch, the excitement of the fight gleaming in her eyes. She starts to shift, powerful legs tensing to move.

But Astra and Merla are one, and quicker than lightning they surge forward like a hurricane.

Drawing her dancing rapier from her sheath as the two charge down on the archfey, Merla sings out a thunderous note that’s concussive wave bombards Amber, forcing her to push through the storm of magic. Simultaneously, her softly glowing aura surges out, everything around getting dimmer as she gets brighter, the air singing with an unknown orchestra of strange music. Astra then disengages, leaping up into the air.

“Coward!” Amber shouts after her.

Merla smirks, unbothered by the name calling.

If there is anything Merla has learned it is what her strengths are and what they are not. Against a foe that can attack her multiple times she has defences she can rely upon, but she has not seen enough of what the Amber Duchess can do to know what her most powerful weapons are. Baine is strong in ways she is not, not counting for the muscles the big guy has. He has a fighting spirit that has withstood a lot and Merla needs to see what she is fighting to better understand what she can do so they can win.

The Duchess darts out to attack Baine and with lightning speed strikes him three times. On the third hit there is a moment where Baine and Frankie both seem to freeze. Merla and Astra both watch intently, holding their breath. Then in the next the two are circling around her, Baine a blur of movement as he swings his fire maul again and again and again.

“Something has happened to him,” Astra indicated towards Baine. “He is still hearty but something has certainly impacted his endurance.”

On the last blow, Amber’s head whips to the side and blood spews from her mouth. She looks at Baine and there’s a light of respect in her eyes. Then she glances up to Merla and there is that excitement again.

Merla knows what she must do.

Calling out a clear resounding note that echoes throughout the roots of the tree in the arena, Astra dives down. Merla twirls her rapier above her head and the echoes of her voice wrap around the silvery-white metal of the blade. Then she is in front of Amber striking out. Merla pierces through the Duchess’ red leather armour just above her heart and she sees the archfey’s eyes widen in sudden, momentary fear. Then Merla’s voice booms out conclusively shaking the Duchess. But she is not finished.

“Quar’atri!*”

The Harmonious Rapier shoots out of Merla’s hand, dances up to slash across the Duchess’s back and then flies back to her hand. Astra circles around her, staying on the hard packed ground, backing up to be a few feet away, just out of her spear’s reach. Merla points her rapier at the Amber Duchess, the challenge clear. She throws a glance to Baine and nods.

Amber falls for the bait.

As she moves, the barely perceptible cocoon of energy that had wrapped around Amber explodes and Merla’s voice booms out once more, making her stumble. But it’s not enough to take her down.

The Duchess grins as her spear leaps forward, about to pierce Merla in the chest.

“Foq’alis!”

Even though she is a beacon of light, as she speaks the word, Merla feels shadows – always present and with her just beneath her skin, mixed in the blood that courses through her veins with the magic of the Feywild – alight in a dark fire. They gather and surge out through the dark talon scars on her back. One second they appear to be dark wings, readying for her to take flight, the next the shadows and dark raven feathers are shielding her from the barrage of attacks the Amber Duchess attempts to lay upon her. Merla thinks for the briefest of moments that she won't fall…

The archfey’s foot manages to break past the shield, connecting with Merla’s face in a surprisingly forceful but elegant tornado roundhouse kick that knocks her off Astra. Everything suddenly goes dark.

Merla feels a warmth seep into her that feels like the first rays of sun touching the land after a long night. Her eyes drift open to see Baine kneeling over her, grinning with Frankie and Astra lurking just behind him.

“Did you do it?” she asks him and he helps her stand up.

He chuckles and nods. “Managed to get her down with a swift bop to the head. But it was a close fight.”

Merla grins, feeling the fuzziness slowly clear from her head.

“Well fought!” the Amber Duchess says, coming over to clap them both on their shoulders. “You may be slow but you hit like an ox.”

“Lean into your strengths, yeah?” Baine says.

The Duchess nods. “That’s what I do. Very well done. Welcome to my court.”

Merla’s eyes find the Green Knight at the top of the arena. She cannot see his face, but he gives a nod down at her for a fight well done.

---

“We have recovered your asset,” Faye says, holding out the badger to the Lady of Silence.

With all the dignity she can muster, she takes the small creature into her arms, looking at it carefully. Then she holds it close to her chest and gently starts stroking its fur.

“The Green Knight is aware that she has been removed by someone,” Faye explains, “however they don’t know it was us due to some clever thinking by BB here.”

“Plan B always works,” the big blue firbolg lady says, nodding sagely.

“So we are in the clear, as far as evidence is concerned.”

The conversation continues on a bit but Merla is only half listening. After the match with the Amber Duchess, she and Baine had stuck around the arena until she heard from Elias they had retrieved the asset they needed to extract. It was easy enough to make their excuses and leave – Baine was the Master at Arms now at the Order of the Crimson Fist, which meant he had his own people he needed to check in on. They were given two potions of Bloodwood Sapjuice for their bout and sent on their merry way without any further adieu, but an invitation to come back anytime they wish.

It wasn’t until they were back on the Material Plane that she found out just exactly who it was BB polymorphed into a badger. It was certainly not someone Merla expected and it only filled her with more questions and uncertainty.

“Sometimes duty demands sacrifices.”

Elias tenses and Merla focuses back on the conversation. Despite her desire to just leave, she knows she must stay here for them, until Elias gets what they did all this for.

“The plans were too much of a risk to go after. As I said the Green Knight was there and we couldn’t risk the main objective being lost to get the second. I’m sure you’ll understand.” Elias says it almost as a question, rather than a statement.

“A proper weighing of risks is prudent,” Silence agrees, nodding.

“As for the matter of payment for this job… Before I request her release will you please tell me what it is my mother did?”

Elias’ waits with bated breath, clearly not sure what sort of story the Lady of Silence will tell about their mother. Merla is watching her carefully and though she is as hard to read as before, that does not stop her from trying.

“Your mother plotted for the downfall of the entire court, the death of its people and the end of our way of life.”

The air rings with the words she speaks, so plainly stated and without lies. It’s almost hard not to believe it.

“O-Oh…” Elias takes a moment to gather their thoughts. “What… What did she plot to do?”

“She was actively engaged in sedition, trying to end and change our way of life. Change the Winter Court at a pace that is unsustainable, that would have resulted in catastrophic damage.”

“Would she do this with the Unseelie?”

“Sometimes the answer lies much closer to the heart,” Silence says, looking at Elias carefully. “Think of the agents of change, those who favour it and those who champion chaos. We favour stability. We favour the right way of doing things. Balance. The proper place that everyone has in our realm, where everyone is and can be, who they are supposed to be, in the right time, in the right place. What Olithia wanted would have resulted in the destruction of everything we stand for. Your escape… it was the last straw. The one thing she did and did not cover her tracks. I had to find out for myself that the woman I loved betrayed me and my child.”

There’s a small gasp. Merla looks at Elais and sees the shock painted clearly on their face. She turns back to the Winter Court eladrin.

“You had better not be lying to my friend,” Merla says with a heated vehemence.

The Lady of Silence glances at her for a second but does not say anything.

“Something about this doesn’t feel right,” Merla says to Astra.

“Hmm, I agree. But which part?”

“I don’t know, and I’m not sure if I will be able to find out.”

Merla gives Elias a worried look.

“We knew the moment you returned to the Winter Court. I knew where you were all those years. I was watching and making sure not to lose track of you. You are so important in more ways than you could possibly imagine. The Queen may have been angry but sometimes you have to give things their proper time to come back to the way they are supposed to be.”

“S-So you’re m-my mother too…” Elias half stammers out.

“I am sure there is much you want to speak about.”

“Yeah.”

“You have earned the favour of the Queen, I am sure of it. Think on what you want to do with this boon. You know how to contact me. Your place at the Winter Court is still yours for the taking, as it was always meant to be.”

“I will think on it and I will let you know when I come to a decision,” Elias says. “Thank you for telling me the truth.”

The Lady of Silence nods and it is the most physical reaction any of them have seen from her so far. Elias clearly wants to talk further but the Lady Silence cannot stay and soon departs.

The sky is already lightening and Merla feels a heaviness to her heart that has little to do with being tired. She wants to go back to the Four Fair Winds, back to Kruxeral, but there is something she must do first.

“I will be but a moment Astra,” she tells her companion as she dismounts, walking over to her friend.

The others are talking amongst themselves, wondering how to divvy up a bag of gems the Lady of Silence had given them as reward for helping the Winter Court. Merla does not let any of her thoughts about the payment show on her face.

“I think this may be the last thing I can help you with for a while Elias,” Merla says, coming up beside her friend. “I am glad you could get what you wanted, but knowing it was Lady Alanaya whom we extracted…” She shakes her head, as though clearing her thoughts. “I have things I must think on, and I’m not sure I can in good conscience help the Winter Court again.”

She takes their hands in hers, holding them tightly as she smiles up at them. “I am glad you got your mother back, though it was not the one you may have initially sought.” Merla pauses, thinks about saying something more but decides now is not the time or the place. Instead she brings their hands up to her forehead just beneath her circlet, kisses their knuckles and then lets go. Then she turns and walks away, feeling her heart constrict as she heads towards Astra.

“I know today was difficult,” Elias says, their words stopping her feet. “I appreciate you putting me first and I won’t forget it. I would hope it goes without saying that I love you like a sister and I understand if you feel you can’t help anymore.”

There is a pause. Merla waits for them to continue.

“Alanaya came as a shock to me too… and I will try to work out what it was that drove her to work with Morinn but… I hope that your decision to not help the Winter Court does not mean that you won’t help my plans to encourage the Courts to work together? I do believe that today, difficult as it has been, was a necessary move to help get the attention and potentially the support of Queen Morinn for a peaceful alternative to this war. Perhaps with this I have her ear enough to have her approach Titania with a peaceful option.”

Merla doesn’t say anything, choosing to stay silent. Elias’ tone changes slightly and she hears the positive spin they are trying to add to their words.

“My mother- it feels unusual saying that so fast… Lady Silence was right though, the Winter Court doesn’t strike first. I don’t think anything bad will happen with whatever they learn from Alanaya.” Merla looks over her shoulder. “Unless its plans for Titania to attack the Winter Court.”

The pause is longer this time. The fae-bard half turns back and sees her friend’s eyes cast down. They are clearly still shaken, and she is glad she did not say what she wanted to before. Then Elias looks up, and their big, bright, beautiful Spring-filled eyes meet hers.

“I need you to know Merla my allegiance is with you and the Feywild.”

Merla feels her heart squeeze once more but she keeps the pain from her face. “You are still arael’ebrath** to me, Elias. If you need anything… I will do what I can.” She smiles softly, the glow from the gem in her circlet warming her expression as her ocean blue eyes meet their pastorally green ones. Then she turns away, walking over to Astra who is already kneeling, waiting for her mistress.

“I am sorry, Merla,” Astra says, kindly. It is no surprise that her partner knows exactly what has been going through Merla’s mind and what she is feeling.

“We cannot always stay where we are. We all have to keep moving forward,” she says solemnly, climbing onto Astra’s back. Merla gives one last lingering look to Elias. “Even if it means our friends must walk a different path than ours.”

Astra nods, then takes off into the night sky.

They chase the stars all the way back to Daring Heights, their twinkling light reflecting in the deep pools of Merla’s eyes as she looks at them, wishing they could answer the questions in her heart.


*Quar’atri! – dance!
**arael’ebrath – heart friend

---

Merla writes a letter to her family, located down in the Shaar, near Eartheart…

Hello,

This letter may come as a surprise to you all, but let me first start by saying what I sang to some of you with the help of Yondalla’s Tree:

I found you. I am safe, and although I forgot you I still love you.

My name is Merla. I am also known as Sheryl, the Fae-Touched here in the Dawnlands and for the past two turns of the wheel I have counted the city of Daring Heights as a second home. The other place I call home is in the Feywild. That is where I have been since I left.

There are many things I wish to say to you all, as I am sure there are countless questions you have for me. Yoara, if you are reading this, I can suspect you have a similar suspicious look on your face as when you, Mama and Papa heard my voice.

I would like to see you all in person if I can. In anticipation of such a visit I can answer one of the questions I am sure you are all asking, in this letter: The reason why I have not reached out before now is both simple and complex. The simple answer is as I said above – I forgot you.

If you would like me to tell you the more complex answer to this and any other questions you all have, let me know and I will find my way to you.

With the Love of Summer’s Light,

Merla