Bog-Standard Diplomacy (11/11) - Jaezred
Nov 12, 2020 10:59:26 GMT
Ian (Menace), Jamie J, and 3 more like this
Post by Jaezred Vandree on Nov 12, 2020 10:59:26 GMT
(Improved) Bullywug Bog Slop
By Lord Jaezred Vandree
INGREDIENTS:
DIRECTIONS:
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
If you have ever gotten lost in the Frog Bog west of Port Ffirst, you might have been found by the resident bullywugs and treated to their hospitality in the form of their signature dish: the bog slop. You might remember it by the way it causes spasms in your stomach walls or the distinct pungent taste that sticks to the roof of your mouth in the following days. I had the "fortune" of tasting bog slop in the halls of the bullywug king Taddern when I travelled to the Frog Bog in a diplomatic outreach mission with others from the Dawnlands. A Northman companion and I had the foresight to bring alcoholic beverages as gifts to the court but even that was not enough to shield our tongues. Thank the goddess for the prestidigitation cantrip.
My companions spent the rest of the day partaking in competitive activities such as mud-wrestling, spear-throwing, and giant spider "rodeo" -- and they all fared very well, to the pleasant surprise of the bullywugs, showing off the might of Dawnlanders. I, however, saved my strength for the final event, a one-on-one duel with the tribe's finest warrior. Whilst Greloman Overcroaker is of exceptional height, musculature, and strength, he was no match for my powerful magic. The entire tribe gasped as I levitated him into the air and knocked him unconscious with offensive spells without him giving even as much as a scratch on my robes. Needless to say, this diplomatic mission was a rousing success.
His Moistness the King granted each of us gifts for our victories and a courtier graciously let me learn their secret bog slop recipe. Unsurprisingly, it was a variety of odd, disgusting ingredients gathered from whatever the swamp gives on that day and heated in lukewarm fetid waters. Then, he divulged to me that this dish is in fact a prank, as the kids would call it nowadays, designed specifically to drive outsiders away from their territory. I had a good laugh at that. Nonetheless, despite this knowledge, I would encourage anyone who is served bog slop to swallow their pride and fear and try to finish it, for it is a good way to earn the bullywugs' respect.
In this recipe, I have re-worked the bog slop into something more palatable to civillised tongues and stomachs, a simple, rustic stew with swampy elements, which you can pair with frog egg pudding, if you are so inclined. I hope it can serve you, dear reader, well during these cold months.
Recipe inspired by this frog leg stew recipe and this beef stew recipe. Thank you to Anthony for the OG bog slop recipe.
By Lord Jaezred Vandree
INGREDIENTS:
- 1 carrot, chopped
- 1 celery stalks, chopped
- 1 tomato, peeled & chopped
- 1 onion, chopped
- 2 cloves of garlic, crushed
- 1/4 lbs of wild mushrooms
- 4 tablespoons of olive oil
- 4 tablespoons of butter
- 1/4 cup of flour
- 2 lbs of frog legs (or any other game meat)
- 6 cups of broth (beef preferred)
- 2 tablespoons of cornstarch
- 2 tablespoons of water
- 1 cup of red wine
- 1 cup of parsley, chopped
- 4 tablespoons of frog eggs
- Salt & pepper
DIRECTIONS:
- Sauté vegetables and mushrooms in olive oil until tender.
- In the meantime, lightly dust frogs legs with flour and cook in butter until brown.
- Add broth and red wine into pan and stir in vegetables, mushrooms, and frog legs, then reduce heat to medium low and let it simmer for 1 hour.
- Mix equal parts cornstarch and water to create a slurry and it to the boiling stew until you reach a thick or "goopy" consistency. Season with salt and pepper.
- Serve with frog eggs and parsley as garnish.
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
If you have ever gotten lost in the Frog Bog west of Port Ffirst, you might have been found by the resident bullywugs and treated to their hospitality in the form of their signature dish: the bog slop. You might remember it by the way it causes spasms in your stomach walls or the distinct pungent taste that sticks to the roof of your mouth in the following days. I had the "fortune" of tasting bog slop in the halls of the bullywug king Taddern when I travelled to the Frog Bog in a diplomatic outreach mission with others from the Dawnlands. A Northman companion and I had the foresight to bring alcoholic beverages as gifts to the court but even that was not enough to shield our tongues. Thank the goddess for the prestidigitation cantrip.
My companions spent the rest of the day partaking in competitive activities such as mud-wrestling, spear-throwing, and giant spider "rodeo" -- and they all fared very well, to the pleasant surprise of the bullywugs, showing off the might of Dawnlanders. I, however, saved my strength for the final event, a one-on-one duel with the tribe's finest warrior. Whilst Greloman Overcroaker is of exceptional height, musculature, and strength, he was no match for my powerful magic. The entire tribe gasped as I levitated him into the air and knocked him unconscious with offensive spells without him giving even as much as a scratch on my robes. Needless to say, this diplomatic mission was a rousing success.
His Moistness the King granted each of us gifts for our victories and a courtier graciously let me learn their secret bog slop recipe. Unsurprisingly, it was a variety of odd, disgusting ingredients gathered from whatever the swamp gives on that day and heated in lukewarm fetid waters. Then, he divulged to me that this dish is in fact a prank, as the kids would call it nowadays, designed specifically to drive outsiders away from their territory. I had a good laugh at that. Nonetheless, despite this knowledge, I would encourage anyone who is served bog slop to swallow their pride and fear and try to finish it, for it is a good way to earn the bullywugs' respect.
In this recipe, I have re-worked the bog slop into something more palatable to civillised tongues and stomachs, a simple, rustic stew with swampy elements, which you can pair with frog egg pudding, if you are so inclined. I hope it can serve you, dear reader, well during these cold months.
Recipe inspired by this frog leg stew recipe and this beef stew recipe. Thank you to Anthony for the OG bog slop recipe.
